Bad Night In A Bad Inn--My Turn

[TomMcC]

You're a Catholic....you know where the answer is. We're stupid and depraved......and we don't know the way of peace. You need some perspective. Family problems can drag the strongest down to despair, and maybe the problem is where your eyes are looking. As for politics.....just think how bad it was in this country in 1860 or 1930 or the world in 1940. Things are bad today, but it seems to me things were really bad at certain times in the past. Bad in a way we don't really understand unless we lived through it.

If you're weak there is someone who is strong. There is someone who wants you to throw up your hands and give up and there is someone who is saying lean on me.......who you going to listen to?

[nml]

Dont take it so personal. Cant turn a ho into a housewife. Or any wife. Modern women are a good time but not suitable for something old fashioned like marrying.

Your son found out the hard way but the sun will come up tomorrow.

[nml]

Steyr that is quite a story thanks for sharing. Nowadays you can just assume everyone is getting no fault divorce right?

[SteyrAUG]

Steyr that is quite a story thanks for sharing. Nowadays you can just assume everyone is getting no fault divorce right?

Probably.

[just a scout]

Steyr, that's a hell of a story.

Few years ago, I went through really bad times. Terrible infidelity, and not by me. Almost ate a pistol but my son came in, sat down and held my hand and listened to me cry like a baby for two hours. Something changed after that for my wife and we reconciled. I love her dearly, but the trust will always be damaged.


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[just a scout]

Divorce is a horrible, terrible thing. I trust a thief or murderer before I trust a cheater.


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[soulezoo]

Steyr, I have almost the exact same story except I don't have the income and dealt with local Leo instead of FBI. 6 years later it still isn't over. And I lost all contacts with my kids and grandkids too.

Not worth getting married these days. Or shacking up either. In CA it's common law after one year.

[SteyrAUG]

Steyr, that's a hell of a story.

I've seen even worse when I worked security clearance for the county. There was a guy who came in for a job with a court ordered letter from his ex wife. In the letter she explained that in the early stages of her divorce from her husband she was encouraged by friends to make allegations of spousal abuse and she staged an incident that resulted in her husband being arrested and prosecuted for domestic violence.

However in this case investigators found a few contradictions and the ex wife later admitted she fabricated the entire story to obtain a better settlement and custody of the children. The judge ordered her to write the letter because an arrest never is removed from your record no matter what you do.

So sure enough when I did the background check, the domestic violence arrest pops up and even if the charges are completely dismissed far too many people just assume the husband hired a high price attorney and "got out of it" which is why the judge again ordered the confession letter from the wife.

But when I sent his file upstairs to the board, a mostly female arbitration panel ignored the letter and one even commented that "where there is smoke, there is usually fire." So even though this guy never did anything wrong and was completely set up, even though investigators even caught the wife lying and she confessed and even with a court ordered letter of admission of guilt from the wife this guy is still not getting hired when he applies for grown up jobs.

In contrast, there was a female applicant for a directors position who lied on her application and stated she had never been arrested and I pulled up two DUI's in the last 5 years, each of which earned her only probation and fines. Typically that is a automatic disqualifier, however in her case her file didn't need to go to arbitration because she cried. She literally started crying in the office when she realized I found two DUIs that for whatever reason she didn't think would get pulled up.

Next thing I knew a senior administrator had come from upstairs and took her and another person into another room to discuss things. After about 10 minutes she came out of the room and her employment application was processed and she got hired for the job. Couldn't believe it. Wish I could say those are the only two incidents like that I ever saw.

Few years ago, I went through really bad times. Terrible infidelity, and not by me. Almost ate a pistol but my son came in, sat down and held my hand and listened to me cry like a baby for two hours. Something changed after that for my wife and we reconciled. I love her dearly, but the trust will always be damaged.


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Glad you are still with us, that is some horrible shit to contemplate.

[SteyrAUG]

Steyr, I have almost the exact same story except I don't have the income and dealt with local Leo instead of FBI. 6 years later it still isn't over. And I lost all contacts with my kids and grandkids too.

Not worth getting married these days. Or shacking up either. In CA it's common law after one year.

Here's hoping the kids and grandkids one day become wise enough to figure out the truth and discover who is at fault. That is really the only thing my father got out of the entire ordeal, my brother and I eventually figured out what was what and broke all contact with our mother. No calls, no cards...nothing. She basically doesn't have kids anymore and there is nothing she could ever do that would make me forgive her for what she did to my father.

[Coal Dragger]

I've seen even worse when I worked security clearance for the county. There was a guy who came in for a job with a court ordered letter from his ex wife. In the letter she explained that in the early stages of her divorce from her husband she was encouraged by friends to make allegations of spousal abuse and she staged an incident that resulted in her husband being arrested and prosecuted for domestic violence.

However in this case investigators found a few contradictions and the ex wife later admitted she fabricated the entire story to obtain a better settlement and custody of the children. The judge ordered her to write the letter because an arrest never is removed from your record no matter what you do.

So sure enough when I did the background check, the domestic violence arrest pops up and even if the charges are completely dismissed far too many people just assume the husband hired a high price attorney and "got out of it" which is why the judge again ordered the confession letter from the wife.

But when I sent his file upstairs to the board, a mostly female arbitration panel ignored the letter and one even commented that "where there is smoke, there is usually fire." So even though this guy never did anything wrong and was completely set up, even though investigators even caught the wife lying and she confessed and even with a court ordered letter of admission of guilt from the wife this guy is still not getting hired when he applies for grown up jobs.

In contrast, there was a female applicant for a directors position who lied on her application and stated she had never been arrested and I pulled up two DUI's in the last 5 years, each of which earned her only probation and fines. Typically that is a automatic disqualifier, however in her case her file didn't need to go to arbitration because she cried. She literally started crying in the office when she realized I found two DUIs that for whatever reason she didn't think would get pulled up.

Next thing I knew a senior administrator had come from upstairs and took her and another person into another room to discuss things. After about 10 minutes she came out of the room and her employment application was processed and she got hired for the job. Couldn't believe it. Wish I could say those are the only two incidents like that I ever saw.



Glad you are still with us, that is some horrible shit to contemplate.

Yeah... you're not inspiring much confidence in .gov hiring standards.

I and many Americans have a rather low opinion of federal employees, this anecdote further reinforces that view.

In fairness I see the same BS in private industry as well. I have some female coworkers who would have been terminated long ago for serious operations violations if they had penises.