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Thread: GD and the dark side of us all.

  1. #21
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    I have strongly disagreed with people on this forum, but I'm having a hard time remembering when I took something really personal or "intentionally" made something personal with another member. I'm sure I've done it, but it wasn't important enough that I still remember it.

    Also inflection can be difficult on the internet and I've taken things the wrong way more times than I can count and I've had things taken in ways never intended many, many times. The problem is people who are subtle and non committal about insults and derogatory comments, sometimes it's hard to tell. When I do insult somebody or a group I try and be plain as day about it and very obvious.

    The other problem is the nature of the internet. It's a lot like youtube comments, most people say what they mean in the most extreme context possible, some even say more than they honestly feel. When it's impersonal, it's easy to do. That's one thing I like about this forum, it's small enough that you get to know everyone a little bit. And then, even if there is somebody you aren't overly fond of, there still is like a sense of decorum for the most part because they are going to be here next week too.

    Quote Originally Posted by usmcvet View Post
    This is a great post. It can be frustrating when discussions go down hill. I know most of the trash talking that takes place anywhere online wouldn't take place face to face. If it did there would be lots of broken noses, fat lips and black eyes.


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    Or it might be like that group in real life who say the worst shit they can think of about each other but you'd never find people who have each others back more than those guys. Not that I'm advocating that kind of environment, no matter how well I come to know somebody...I always worry about what is going over the line.
    It's hard to be a ACLU hating, philosophically Libertarian, socially liberal, fiscally conservative, scientifically grounded, agnostic, porn admiring gun owner who believes in self determination.

    Chuck, we miss ya man.

    كافر

  2. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by ABNAK View Post
    You can't pick and choose......that would be bigoted/racist/homophobic/Islamophobic/whatever. It's easier and more fair if you just hate everyone equally!
    Had a teacher in high school that lived by that.

    Go up-
    Hey Rist.
    Yeah.
    Can you help me out here?
    Sure.

    Go over whatever you needed to go over.

    Say thanks.
    No problem....I'd of helped a black kid too.
    Rist what...what'd you say??
    I said, no problem....I'd of helped a black kid too.

    Rist, you allowed to say that kinda stuff??
    Sure, I hate everyone of you scum bags.............EQUALLY!

    He ended up becoming an administrator, great guy.

    NYH1.

    ROLLTIDE!
    NYSRPA Member.

  3. #23
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    Steyraug is right about inflection, non verbal, etc.

    If you grew up in a very cold, very northern, very stoic upbringing where guys relentlessly take the piss out of each other non stop,
    For fun, for showing affection, for venting anger, for some more fun,
    And sprinkle almost three decades of military service on top of that, with the same type of stuff,

    It is easy to see how some from different environments are a little rattled by it.

  4. #24
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    GD and the dark side of us all.

    Quote Originally Posted by ramairthree View Post
    Steyraug is right about inflection, non verbal, etc.

    If you grew up in a very cold, very northern, very stoic upbringing where guys relentlessly take the piss out of each other non stop,
    For fun, for showing affection, for venting anger, for some more fun,
    And sprinkle almost three decades of military service on top of that, with the same type of stuff,

    It is easy to see how some from different environments are a little rattled by it.
    I didn’t read his comment the same way. I believe the issue is inherent to any forum or inherent to the typed word. It is devoid of all physical non-verbal queues. There is no facial expression, nor eye movement, no hands moving or waving and as you and Steyr suggested there is no inflection or tone of voice. I think guys who have been around traveling the country or world, or in the military aren’t affected by “yankee-talk” or “southern talk”think we can ID when a guy is rough around the edges or whether he’s just an asshat.


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    Last edited by RobertTheTexan; 12-14-17 at 10:33.
    "Texas has yet to learn submission to any oppression, come from what source it may."
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  5. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by ramairthree View Post
    Steyraug is right about inflection, non verbal, etc.

    If you grew up in a very cold, very northern, very stoic upbringing where guys relentlessly take the piss out of each other non stop,
    For fun, for showing affection, for venting anger, for some more fun,
    And sprinkle almost three decades of military service on top of that, with the same type of stuff,

    It is easy to see how some from different environments are a little rattled by it.
    Or the Midwest - "Midwest nice" is just a veneer. We're brutal with each other on a personal level, so internet comments have little effect on my day.

    I don't think getting rid of GD is the answer - in all likelihood the behavior in question would probably just bleed over into the other areas.

  6. #26
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    Something I've noticed is the tendency for members to essentially dogpile on people expressing opinions different from the general group consensus. Shouting down differing schools of thought isn't helpful to anyone involved.

    I'll freely admit that I've been on both sides of that equation.

  7. #27
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    After reading the last 3 pages, there's hope for us all yet.

  8. #28
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    Quote Originally Posted by sundance435 View Post
    I don't think getting rid of GD is the answer - in all likelihood the behavior in question would probably just bleed over into the other areas.
    The technical sections of the forum are less prone to adverse behaviour (not that it doesn't happen); because the subject matter is a bit more objective. GD is still around because some of us moderators have advocated for it, and promised to do our best to help keep it civil. GD is where most of the arguments/drama has happened in the past, which resulted in members getting banned or time off, so site owners/staff questioned the value of having it around since M4C is primarily intended to be a technical forum, and whether it was worth the trouble to moderate, and whether it added or detracted from the forum.

    I was one of the moderators that felt that it could be of value; as a place to discuss all the other non-technical subjects. So site owners agreed to keep GD as long as we kept it from going out of hand. GD isn't intended to be a 'free-for-all/anything goes' section; the same rules and guidelines apply to it. Mainly, be respectful and open minded. No personal insults etc. We discuss some very volatile subjects in GD, so discussions are bound to get heated.

    GD is what we make of it; and if we want to keep it around, it's in our best interests to self-moderate and check our egos at the door before entering. If we ever lose GD, we'll only have ourselves to blame.

  9. #29
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    I always kinda live by the Golden Rule; here, everywhere. If I get into a discussion where I feel like I am getting out of line, I just remove myself. I have had a couple people PM me, say "you were an A-hole...everything OK?" I usually will go back and apologize (I never mean to be an A-hole) and move on.

  10. #30
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    For the record I may get irked but I cant say I would really 'hate' people I dont know over words.

    chuckman's experiences mirror my own. I've had disagreements that had the air cleared with a friendly PM.

    Really all it takes.

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