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Thread: I Need Help! (Advice for Out of Shape 40 Year Old)

  1. #1
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    I Need Help! (Advice for Out of Shape 40 Year Old)

    My wife looked at me last night and said, out of the blue, "do you want to start going to the gym?" At first I thought she meant this as a couples thing, but then she made it clear that she was NOT going. I'm not quite sure how to take that but that's for another discussion.

    Anyway, I'm turning 40 this year and I'm out of shape. I'm 6'2", 245ish and I could easily get winded on a few flights of stairs. So I'm here looking for some advice on a workout routine. I don't need to bulk up and look like Arnold in his heyday and I don't need to be able to run a marathon but I'd like to be somewhere in the middle, build some muscle and some stamina. I know a LOT (ok, probably most) of it is going to start with what I eat. That part is a little easier for me to understand but I'm lost when it comes to when and how I should workout to achieve my goal. I think I get a discount at my local YMCA so that'll probably be where I go.

    Any help would be appreciated.

  2. #2
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    It all starts with what is going on between the ears. No excuse for being overweight; none at all. No medical condition, no medicine, no work routine, not stress, etc. cause one to be overweight. Impulse control and self-control are the key to weight loss and then maintaining an appropriate weight. Once again, it is about self-control and impulse control b/c staying in shape/getting in shape starts and stops in the kitchen, not the gym.

    First, you need to figure out your macros/micros in your diet as well as overall caloric intake. I'm 6'0", and bounce between 155-157 range. Have a muscular, not skinny, look albeit it is a thin muscular. Had back surgery yr. ago that didn't go so well so recovery has been slow so weight maintenence is through the kitchen, light lifting, and light running(live in northern UT so light runs mean large changes in elevation), and having two young children keeping me busy. Have only been able to do very limited BJJ since my body isn't ready to be beat on and having someone taking me down hard to the mat is too much of an injury risk right now. This has meant only light workouts with limited full contact and on a limited basis. Point being, again, that weight loss/maintenance starts/ends in the kitchen which is built on impulse and self-control.

    So, for me to stay at 155 I use a simple formula. Take your ideal weight and multiply it by 12. Me: 155 X 12=1860 which is the total number of calories I want to generally take in during a day. 1860/2000=93; 1860 calories is 93% of the 2,000 cal/day generally referenced on nutritional labels. I just intake around 93% of the fat, carbs, protein, etc. If my activity level causes me to lose weight, then I simply eat more. As I've said on here many times, I eat what I want, but so that I still fall within my requirements. Breakfast is usually a 12oz. Sprite and a protein drink. Lunch may be yogurt with peanut butter, or a chicken breast with pasta, or a piece of cake, whatever. I just keep it within the requirements. However, my diet overall is pretty clean.

    As far as beginning a workout program, at your base line, it is simple. Start walking. Get some good shoes and hit the bricks. At 6'2", 245, you're carrying a good bit of extra weight. Going too hard, too fast can be rough on your joints and injury/discouragement is what you want to prevent. Get out, go for a long walk, and do a systems check. Try a little stretching, vary the pace, maybe even a very short, light run. Figure out how hard and how long you can walk for. First two weeks, one day on, two off. Basing this on you getting winded on a flight of stairs. Each week try to add just a bit more distance and intensity. If you correct your eating habits and start walking, you will see weight loss, no doubt. After a month or so depending on how you feel, increase the frequency to one day on, one day off. I like to go two days on, one day off. Frequency is personal and hard to give advice on b/c of differences in work habits, home routines, lifestyle, physical conditioning, changing body goals, etc. One more reason it all starts/ends in the kitchen.

    I wouldn't worry about hitting the Y just yet. Do your own thing for a little while and then make the jump. If you are itching to lift some, go buy a set of weights(dumbells) from somewhere and hit the garage. Push-ups, lunges, jump rope, etc.; there are plenty of cardio/strength exercises that you can do at home. Hell, I set up cones and do agility/quickness/timing exercises in the driveway. Also use jump boxes(plyometrics). Not going the gym saves time. When you are ready to take full advantage of the machines and free weights, then go to the Y. I've built up a decent home gym and you may want to go that route in time as well.

  3. #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by 6933 View Post
    It all starts with what is going on between the ears. No excuse for being overweight; none at all. No medical condition, no medicine, no work routine, not stress, etc. cause one to be overweight. Impulse control and self-control are the key to weight loss and then maintaining an appropriate weight. Once again, it is about self-control and impulse control b/c staying in shape/getting in shape starts and stops in the kitchen, not the gym.

    First, you need to figure out your macros/micros in your diet as well as overall caloric intake. I'm 6'0", and bounce between 155-157 range. Have a muscular, not skinny, look albeit it is a thin muscular. Had back surgery yr. ago that didn't go so well so recovery has been slow so weight maintenence is through the kitchen, light lifting, and light running(live in northern UT so light runs mean large changes in elevation), and having two young children keeping me busy. Have only been able to do very limited BJJ since my body isn't ready to be beat on and having someone taking me down hard to the mat is too much of an injury risk right now. This has meant only light workouts with limited full contact and on a limited basis. Point being, again, that weight loss/maintenance starts/ends in the kitchen which is built on impulse and self-control.

    So, for me to stay at 155 I use a simple formula. Take your ideal weight and multiply it by 12. Me: 155 X 12=1860 which is the total number of calories I want to generally take in during a day. 1860/2000=93; 1860 calories is 93% of the 2,000 cal/day generally referenced on nutritional labels. I just intake around 93% of the fat, carbs, protein, etc. If my activity level causes me to lose weight, then I simply eat more. As I've said on here many times, I eat what I want, but so that I still fall within my requirements. Breakfast is usually a 12oz. Sprite and a protein drink. Lunch may be yogurt with peanut butter, or a chicken breast with pasta, or a piece of cake, whatever. I just keep it within the requirements. However, my diet overall is pretty clean.

    As far as beginning a workout program, at your base line, it is simple. Start walking. Get some good shoes and hit the bricks. At 6'2", 245, you're carrying a good bit of extra weight. Going too hard, too fast can be rough on your joints and injury/discouragement is what you want to prevent. Get out, go for a long walk, and do a systems check. Try a little stretching, vary the pace, maybe even a very short, light run. Figure out how hard and how long you can walk for. First two weeks, one day on, two off. Basing this on you getting winded on a flight of stairs. Each week try to add just a bit more distance and intensity. If you correct your eating habits and start walking, you will see weight loss, no doubt. After a month or so depending on how you feel, increase the frequency to one day on, one day off. I like to go two days on, one day off. Frequency is personal and hard to give advice on b/c of differences in work habits, home routines, lifestyle, physical conditioning, changing body goals, etc. One more reason it all starts/ends in the kitchen.

    I wouldn't worry about hitting the Y just yet. Do your own thing for a little while and then make the jump. If you are itching to lift some, go buy a set of weights(dumbells) from somewhere and hit the garage. Push-ups, lunges, jump rope, etc.; there are plenty of cardio/strength exercises that you can do at home. Hell, I set up cones and do agility/quickness/timing exercises in the driveway. Also use jump boxes(plyometrics). Not going the gym saves time. When you are ready to take full advantage of the machines and free weights, then go to the Y. I've built up a decent home gym and you may want to go that route in time as well.
    Spot on. Walk, don't run, but walk fast. Body-weight exercises. You wanna burn fat? Burpees will burn you some fat. Nothing wrong with the gym, but you don't need the gym. And absolutely, success in weight loss/fat loss begins and ends in the kitchen.

    Edited to add, at 40 you are on the cusp on your body's metabolism and speed of recovery revolting. NOW is the time to do it.

  4. #4
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    4 months ago my wife got me a gym membership, I'm 100% T/P disabled vet for neck and back injuries so I'm limited to what I can do in the gym.

    I am 5'8" and weighed 267 lbs.

    I'm retired and 45 so I can go to the gym as much as I want and have all day.

    I ride a stationary bike that has a seat like a chair so I don't have to lean forward, I ride that for an hr a day 5 days a week. I watch music video on my cell phone while riding so I don't get bored.

    Then I lift weights for about an hr depending if I'm in pain or not.

    I'm down to 242 without changing my diet or going on any diet.

    25 lbs isn't a lot but I'm just starting out, I want to be in the 230 range by the end of Feb.
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  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by hdrolling View Post
    4 months ago my wife got me a gym membership, I'm 100% T/P disabled vet for neck and back injuries so I'm limited to what I can do in the gym.

    I am 5'8" and weighed 267 lbs.

    I'm retired and 45 so I can go to the gym as much as I want and have all day.

    I ride a stationary bike that has a seat like a chair so I don't have to lean forward, I ride that for an hr a day 5 days a week. I watch music video on my cell phone while riding so I don't get bored.

    Then I lift weights for about an hr depending if I'm in pain or not.

    I'm down to 242 without changing my diet or going on any diet.

    25 lbs isn't a lot but I'm just starting out, I want to be in the 230 range by the end of Feb.
    25# IS a lot; it's about 10% of your overall weight. Good on you.

  6. #6
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    All good suggestions
    I'll add cut all sugary drinks and snacks

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by officerX View Post
    My wife looked at me last night and said, out of the blue, "do you want to start going to the gym?" At first I thought she meant this as a couples thing, but then she made it clear that she was NOT going.
    "I'll go if you will" would be my response. Other then that, good advice given already. Don't over complicate it.
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  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by WillBrink View Post
    "I'll go if you will" would be my response.
    LOL. Perfect response. Game. Set. Match.

    My problem is portion control: I always seem to think I need more than I do. I'm learning how to eat less, and I find that I don't miss the "extra" portion. For example, when an 8 oz steak is just as good as a 12 oz steak as far as not feeling hungry in an hour.

    You might experiment with maybe ordering "just" the burger without the fries and see if that fills you up, or "just" the small breakfast portion instead of this plus that plus that and that.

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by WillBrink View Post
    "I'll go if you will" would be my response. Other then that, good advice given already. Don't over complicate it.
    LOL
    there's another issue going on here if she does not want to go
    anyway- lots of good and fun calorie burning activities one can do outside instead of being inside a nasty gym

  10. #10
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    You are about 50 lbs overweight. Being obese at age 40 doesn't bode well for your health or longevity. Your wife has made a good suggestion and it's unlikely that she said it "out of the blue"...it's likely that it's been on her mind for awhile. You have to find an activity that you enjoy, burns calories, and gets your heart working because your cardiovascular health is your most important priority right now. As to weight loss, exercise will make little contribution to that. Weight loss is all about decreasing calorie intake. Decreasing calorie intake is all about lifestyle change. Diets don't work, lifestyle change does. It's a very difficult process with a low success rate but it's very important (to you and to her).


    .
    Last edited by Hmac; 01-30-18 at 15:37.

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