Wow, Getting a Divorce...

[sadmin]

Im very sorry to hear that. My wife and I will be praying for you. Dont feel conflicted over your faith and your wifes decision. She is far from the light at the moment, and does not comprehend the depth of her decision.

1 Corinthians 7:15 (The Message)

15-16On the other hand, if the unbelieving spouse walks out, you've got to let him or her go. You don't have to hold on desperately. God has called us to make the best of it, as peacefully as we can. You never know, wife: The way you handle this might bring your husband not only back to you but to God. You never know, husband: The way you handle this might bring your wife not only back to you but to God.

[kwelz]

Sorry to hear about this. I am afraid I can't help though. While I did go through a divorce, mine was very peaceful. Neither of us needed attorneys and We never had to get into it. Best of luck to you my friend.

[Nathan_Bell]

As a few others stated, find a good lawyer PDQ. Not doing so will leave you sorry and sore.

[mechelaar]

Having seen my fair share of divorces go to shit, I will also recommend getting a good lawyer. Remember, one of the most expensive things you can ever buy is a cheap attorney.

[mnoe82]

Ill be praying brother. Lawyer up.

[GermanSynergy]

I'm sorry to hear it, bro. Getting divorced sucks! As others have said, LAWYER UP NOW! Right now. Don't wait a second.

[Doran]

Having just gone through this the entire last year I can only echo what the others have said. Get your lawyer now and move on their advice.

As much as you might want to 'work it out' and 'be civil' you need to protect yourself at all times now.

This isn't to say you can't be civil, but being the good guy now may cost you. Don't think this out alone, don't think you can be reasonable with her and it will help. Let the lawyer help guide your every move.

She's acquired her legal representation, now it's your turn.

Good luck, and as others say, it will get better!

[Gramps]

You can only change Yourself. You Cannot change others. I tried to change my first wife, (and second) but when I realized I can only be accountable for myself, it changed my life and outlook on it.

Unless SHE WANTS help, there is NOTHING anyone can do.

Speaking from experience: GET A LAWYER, AND ASK AROUND AS TO WHO HAS USED A GOOD ONE FOR REFERENCES.

Don't leave God out in your decisions.

[Macx]

Actually, I think in most states one-party consent is acceptable. Be sure and check - but I'd keep a little pocket digital recorder in my pocket and when conversing with her if she threatens to make false accusations against you you'll have some defense.

Best of luck to you.

Comforting and helpful outside the courtroom, not admissable inside, in most courtrooms, if she doesn't know she is being recorded.




Went through a rough one myself. . . though mine was a case of wife getting sex from a man with deeper pockets about 12 years my senior & refusing to quit when busted. They are still together . ..

I will say, that I remarried and did much better the second time around. I now have two beautiful children and a woman who loves me like I have never been loved before in my life. In the first two months she knew me better than my first wife did in seven years. Sometimes these things have happy endings.

Remember, one of the most expensive things you can ever buy is a cheap attorney.

Truer words have seldom been spoken. Seriously, I got what I could afford & in the end, she walked away with 20% of the debt and 80% of the assets, I got 80% of the debt and 20% of the assets. . . it ruined me financially. It would have been cheaper to have gone into debt to pay a better lawyer. Bear in mind, she was the cheating spouse and (for that chapter of my life anyhow) I was a choirboy.


These things are ugly & the mental illness aspect makes them uglier. I am sorry you are going through this man. I will be praying.

[crusader4x]

I'm a fellow Believer and am going through a divorce myself. Wife had me served with divorce papers at what was supposed to be our first JOINT marriage therapy session.

To make matters worse, two weeks after being served divorce papers, our oldest son was diagnosed w/ a brain tumor. The tumor has since been removed, he's been through radiation and is almost done with chemo. His MRI came back clear earlier this week. Decent prognosis of NEVER seeing a tumor again.

Like others have said, get a GOOD lawyer and document, document, document.

Let me share what my pastor (who had a similar experience) consistently told me during the rough times. While you may be in a dark place right now, God IS good. You WILL smile again. You WILL have good times again. He was right. In fact, many of my friends have told me that I seem happier now than I have been in YEARS.

Divorce SUCKS. It SUCKS even worse for my three kids (split custody at exactly 50/50 - one week w/ me, one week w/ her all year round). BUT, I'm a better man since the divorce. I'm a changed man, a much better father, and I'm GOING to be a great husband to wife #2 (who I may have discovered already ).

I'll be praying for you brother. For you - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uHdcyue0bSw