PDA

View Full Version : Absolutely CLASSIC Neighbor dispute



RIDE
02-26-13, 08:05
A buddy emailed me a link to this.. so dang good!!! lol

Initial Letter from David
http://thechive.files.wordpress.com/2012/05/austrailian-troll-letters-11.jpg?w=500&h=745

Zoomed in of drawing...
http://thechive.files.wordpress.com/2012/05/lead27.jpg?w=500&h=368

Email Response from Justin
http://thechive.files.wordpress.com/2012/05/austrailian-troll-letters-0.jpg?w=500&h=238

Email response from David
http://thechive.files.wordpress.com/2012/05/austrailian-troll-letters-3.jpg?w=500&h=782

Email response from Justin
http://thechive.files.wordpress.com/2012/05/austrailian-troll-letters-4.jpg?w=500&h=311

Email response from David
http://thechive.files.wordpress.com/2012/05/austrailian-troll-letters-5.jpg?w=500&h=728

Email response from Justin
http://thechive.files.wordpress.com/2012/05/austrailian-troll-letters-6.jpg?w=500&h=179

Email response from David
http://thechive.files.wordpress.com/2012/05/austrailian-troll-letters-7.jpg?w=500&h=411

Email Response from Justin
http://thechive.files.wordpress.com/2012/05/austrailian-troll-letters-8.jpg?w=500&h=205

Email Response from David
http://thechive.files.wordpress.com/2012/05/austrailian-troll-letters-9.jpg?w=500&h=242

Email response from Justin
http://thechive.files.wordpress.com/2012/05/austrailian-troll-letters-10.jpg?w=500&h=171

Email Response from David
http://thechive.files.wordpress.com/2012/05/austrailian-troll-letters-1.jpg?w=500&h=263

Email response from Justin
http://thechive.files.wordpress.com/2012/05/austrailian-troll-letters-2.jpg?w=500&h=170

The end.

munch520
02-26-13, 08:19
Hilarious! The shit people get into sometimes....

The neighbor we back up to lets his kids play in the trees at the back of our property. No problem. Our dog also poops there. So he gets pissed, bags the crap up, and throws it in our yard. Pissed because his kids are stepping in MY dog's shit in MY yard. Of course I had to text him

1. Tell your ankle biters to get the **** out of our yard if they're scared of dog poop.
2. Thanks for bagging up the poop. Ill tell my wife my chores are done.

RMiller
02-26-13, 08:20
Quite enjoyable.... :D

Pork Chop
02-26-13, 08:51
That is some seriously funny shit.


I have a neighbor who walked his ****ing Newfoundland by my house every night in the summer and lets his black horse shit in my yard. I don't have pets because I don't care to clean up dog shit. Period. So, after several attempts at being neighborly and asking politely for him to just carry a scooper and even giving him permission to enter my property to use the trash barrel if he would just clean up after his animal, I started delivering it to his home. Personally. On his front steps.

He found a new route to walk with homeowners who appreciate free fertilizer.

I despise living in town and will rectify this as soon as my kids are old enough to drive themselves to all their activities.

Ironman8
02-26-13, 08:58
Haha! I was literally laughing out loud here in the office! Thanks for sharing.

munch520
02-26-13, 09:05
Yeah that Australian dude is hilarious...a smartass, but hilarious.


That is some seriously funny shit.


I have a neighbor who walked his ****ing Newfoundland by my house every night in the summer and lets his black horse shit in my yard. I don't have pets because I don't care to clean up dog shit. Period. So, after several attempts at being neighborly and asking politely for him to just carry a scooper and even giving him permission to enter my property to use the trash barrel if he would just clean up after his animal, I started delivering it to his home. Personally. On his front steps.

He found a new route to walk with homeowners who appreciate free fertilizer.

I despise living in town and will rectify this as soon as my kids are old enough to drive themselves to all their activities.

That'd piss me off too

RIDE
02-26-13, 09:09
Yeah that Australian dude is hilarious...a smartass, but hilarious.

Agreed... the freaking riddle had me crying!!!

"What burns with the light of a thousand suns and is in the letterbox?"

:lol::lol::lol:

Pork Chop
02-26-13, 09:13
It would be hard not to like a guy who is that funny. Coming on my property would be a poor start, but it would be hard not to like the guy. Seems like some resolution could've been easier coming.

Either way, I laughed out loud and thoroughly enjoyed that. :)

chuckman
02-26-13, 09:45
Thanks...needed that.

Zhurdan
02-26-13, 09:50
A few years ago, a new neighbor moved in across the street who loved to blow his snow into the street, which is illegal, but the city never does anything about it. Aside from it being a nuisance, it create a bunch of ice in the street on a corner. I couldn't prove it, but myself and another neighbor believe it was the cause of at least three accidents.

So, after having asked him politely several times to no end, we fired up our snow blowers one snowy day and cleaned his driveway for him. Unfortunately, it was all blown onto his porch and half way up his front door. He promptly stopped blowing his snow into the street. :D

nobody knows
02-26-13, 10:43
Your nighbor is a funny guy.

brickboy240
02-26-13, 10:43
I would have just bought a room darkening shade and called it good.

Chicken?

Maybe to you but the benefit of the bright light for both of us IS a plus. The fact that THEY get to pay the bill for a security light that I also benefit from is a good thing...if you look at it correctly.

Not into tons of verbal ju-jitsu with morons...sorry.

-brickboy240

SteyrAUG
02-26-13, 12:14
Hilarious! The shit people get into sometimes....

The neighbor we back up to lets his kids play in the trees at the back of our property. No problem. Our dog also poops there. So he gets pissed, bags the crap up, and throws it in our yard. Pissed because his kids are stepping in MY dog's shit in MY yard. Of course I had to text him

1. Tell your ankle biters to get the **** out of our yard if they're scared of dog poop.
2. Thanks for bagging up the poop. Ill tell my wife my chores are done.

I had a similar problem years ago. The house behind me was vacant and the yard west of me was not fenced. That meant every kid who didn't want to walk around the block climbed my fence, onto my shed and jumped into the neighboring yard to "cut through" the block.

I quickly discovered telling kids to not climb on my fence or shed did nothing more than make them attempt to do it without being caught. They'd get caught say "ok, sorry" (if you were lucky) and then the same little ****ers would be doing it again within 24 hours.

Polite requests did nothing, yelling at them did nothing. They were convinced there was NOTHING an adult could really do about it. And I'm not going to call the cops because kids are climbing my fence and shed. You can rest assured however if they got hurt doing it, THEIR parents would call the cops and a lawyer.

Seemed like a no win situation for me, but thankfully I grew up reading Soldier of Fortune and books like Mines & Booby Traps used in South Vietnam 1965.

So there is a telephone pole between my back fence and the wood fence of the neighbor west of the house directly behind me. The telephone poll has a tree growing next to it with branches that obscure more of the poll. There is a gap between the two wooden fences with a chain link post that the kids use for a step up to get on top of my shed and from there jump into the yard next door which is not completely fenced in (only a wooden fence along the back).

Perfect tripwire location.

So I cut a gallon milk jug in half and fill if with the endless supply of dogshit available to me and add some water for consistency and to keep it ripe. Using a ladder I place the milk jug about 10 feet above the top edge of the fence on some tree branches running against the telephone pole.

Tied to the handle of the milk jug is a long piece of brown nylon cord which hangs through the small opening between the two wooden fences and then attaches to a screw installed on my fence.

Artist rendition.

http://imageshack.us/a/img171/9859/trippb6.jpg

Then sit back and wait. Later the next evening I'm sitting in my living room when I hear a sounds followed by a kid exclaiming "Awwww shit.......IT'S SHIT!" I look out the window and see three shit saturated **** tard kids who look like trees with moss growing on them.

This happened many years ago. Never had a problem since. It's still funny.

obucina
02-26-13, 12:26
we had a problem with a neighbor when i was a kid....his chihuahua would crap in our yard, so my dad gave it some chocolate exlax and sent it home...it never crapped in the yard again!

Of course the neighbor was 5'5" and a fatass and my dad was 6'1" with a fumanchu, who also didnt take shit from anyone. He had a purposeful habit of addressing d-bag neighbors with a marlboro red in one hand and a jack on the rocks in another:D

B Cart
02-26-13, 12:26
haha Steyr that is awesome!! Too bad you didn't get it on video!

RIDE
02-26-13, 13:31
Steyr!!! Also classic!!! Man!!! So awesome!!

Today has been a good day!

Airhasz
02-26-13, 14:12
While not as satisfying or as funny as dog shit, wheel bearing grease on top rail of fence will stop repeat fence jumpers.

TriviaMonster
02-26-13, 14:42
Wow. Win. That had me laughing really hard. That last riddle, damn that was funny.

Sent from my Galaxy Nexus using Tapatalk 2

Texas42
02-26-13, 15:02
Thanks for posting that.

Safetyhit
02-26-13, 15:48
Seemed like a no win situation for me, but thankfully I grew up reading Soldier of Fortune and books like Mines & Booby Traps used in South Vietnam 1965.



We really are brothers from another mother. Remember the blow dart ads and that hot brunette model resembling Daisy Duke recurring often and usually carrying an Uzi working for someone I can't recall?

SteyrAUG
02-26-13, 16:14
We really are brothers from another mother. Remember the blow dart ads and that hot brunette model resembling Daisy Duke recurring often and usually carrying an Uzi working for someone I can't recall?

Thank God I still have my Jivaro blowgun.

http://blowgun.lefora.com/composition/attachment/2cef17d4a8346f7ef81f9a60e9aaed4c/309908/jivaro%20ad%201982.JPG

Safetyhit
02-26-13, 16:42
Thank God I still have my Jivaro blowgun.

http://blowgun.lefora.com/composition/attachment/2cef17d4a8346f7ef81f9a60e9aaed4c/309908/jivaro%20ad%201982.JPG


Owned at least 3, all lost and as you probably know for me that hits particularly hard. Remember cutting the wire to size and heating it so it would melt into the plastic bead. And NEVER inhaling as you brought it up to "fire".

They sure penetrated coffee cans (and numerous other things) efficiently as advertised.

SteyrAUG
02-26-13, 16:45
Owned at least 3, all lost and as you probably know for me that hits particularly hard. Remember cutting the wire to size and heating it so it would melt into the plastic bead. And NEVER inhaling as you brought it up to "fire".

They sure penetrated coffee cans efficiently as advertised.

Not to mention figuring out how to pull the beads off the string without breaking them.

I went through about a dozen of them. Most were custom sized by me to be a bit more portable.

Safetyhit
02-26-13, 16:55
Not to mention figuring out how to pull the beads off the string without breaking them.

I went through about a dozen of them. Most were custom sized by me to be a bit more portable.


That's too much. You deserve one of my ancient coins for sure, a truly worthwhile candidate and I remember what you said of course.

Going to post one last group of old items in that thread of mine soon, then look for a PM.

Moose-Knuckle
02-26-13, 17:59
I guess walking across the street and knocking on a door to explain the situation and simply ask for the light to be moved is just too much for some folks. So hey let's trespass and send harassing emails. :rolleyes: Two wrongs don’t make a right.

If that had happen to me I would have put two lights up just in spite of the guy, after the second one was taken down I would install a third and place a large aggressive dog on a run at the base of the lights . . . so on and so forth. I'd have some real fun with the poor soul at that point.

Inkslinger
02-26-13, 18:20
I hate to rain on everybody's parade, but this is more than likely a two way conversation in one mans head. It's written by humorist David Thorne. Here's his website if you're interested,
http://www.27bslash6.com/
I like to believe its real. Funny shit...

RIDE
02-26-13, 19:02
I hate to rain on everybody's parade, but this is more than likely a two way conversation in one mans head. It's written by humorist David Thorne. Here's his website if you're interested,
http://www.27bslash6.com/
I like to believe its real. Funny shit...

That IS the same David Thorne, but the story was not made up in his head... he describes his existing relationship with said neighbor and his intentions prior to moving to a new neighborhood.

Safetyhit
02-26-13, 19:11
Whether it was made up or not it basically borders on the absurd. Way too elongated and trivial.

LowSpeed_HighDrag
02-26-13, 19:20
Having lived on base housing, and then in apartments populated with divorced Marines in SoCal for the first 4 years of my adult life, I can very much relate to this story. Hilarious....but also close to home...