View Full Version : ARISE MY BROTHERS AND SISTERS- IT'S TIME!
It's an abomination to see people going down to Wal-Mart and buying up all the candy for themselves and planning to share it only with a few, select children. That's not fair that one percent of the population should be able to determine who gets candy and who does not. All children should be given candy equally. It's racist! It's class war!
It's time to OCCUPY HALLOWEEN!!
I actually buy "merit based" candy. I buy a bag of decent mini bars like snickers, butterfingers, etc. I buy a bag of "on sale" crap like candy corn, whatever is in those brown and orange wrappers and smarties, and I buy a bunch of pencils.
If you are a decent kid from MY neighborhood I let you pick a couple from the bowl, your choice. If you are bussed in from a shitty neighborhood or are local and made zero effort regarding your costume I generally drop a piece of "bargain" candy in your bag.
If you are bussed in from a shitty neighborhood and made zero effort regarding your costume, you get a pencil. If you are a shithead kid that is local, you also get a pencil. If you are actually high school age (or sadly older) and going door to door for "free candy" I throw a pencil at your head.
If you are bussed in, and made some kind of creative effort with respect to your costume (because I understand your welfare parents won't give you shit) and you know how to talk to adults correctly you might just earn yourself a "pick two" and I'll throw a pencil at your parents for you.
And if you try and pull that OCCUPY shit in my neighborhood, I'll own all of your Smarties.
AUG, I thought for sure you were going to work Skittles in there somewhere.
Reason #489,512 why I live out in the country.
We all know the Honduran child immigrant crisis was manufactured to support the candy industry. Wake up, people!
:P
Straight Shooter
10-15-14, 06:25
AUG, I thought for sure you were going to work Skittles in there somewhere.
THAT is f-in funny.
Me, I don't do the Halloween thang, Ole Scratch gets enough outta me during the year, I damn sure aint devoting an entire night to him. But that's just me.
The_War_Wagon
10-15-14, 06:37
THAT is f-in funny.
Me, I don't do the Halloween thang, Ole Scratch gets enough outta me during the year, I damn sure aint devoting an entire night to him. But that's just me.
^^^ THIS.
We ONLY celebrate the Festival Eve of the Reformation at OUR house. I dress up like Martin Luther, and hand out Small Catechisms to the kids. :cool:
http://media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/1d/5f/00/1d5f0064e96ccddf0ad700971bb1bb15.jpg
... Ein feste Burg ist unser Gott... :D
Crow Hunter
10-15-14, 08:28
I actually buy "merit based" candy. I buy a bag of decent mini bars like snickers, butterfingers, etc. I buy a bag of "on sale" crap like candy corn, whatever is in those brown and orange wrappers and smarties, and I buy a bunch of pencils.
If you are a decent kid from MY neighborhood I let you pick a couple from the bowl, your choice. If you are bussed in from a shitty neighborhood or are local and made zero effort regarding your costume I generally drop a piece of "bargain" candy in your bag.
If you are bussed in from a shitty neighborhood and made zero effort regarding your costume, you get a pencil. If you are a shithead kid that is local, you also get a pencil. If you are actually high school age (or sadly older) and going door to door for "free candy" I throw a pencil at your head.
If you are bussed in, and made some kind of creative effort with respect to your costume (because I understand your welfare parents won't give you shit) and you know how to talk to adults correctly you might just earn yourself a "pick two" and I'll throw a pencil at your parents for you.
And if you try and pull that OCCUPY shit in my neighborhood, I'll own all of your Smarties.
Man that reminds be of living in a subdivision in Clarksville. It was a very nice subdivision and you would literally see a line of cars out on the main road waiting to get in like it was a concert or something. :confused:
Every year, there would be kids that I had never even seen before ringing my door bell for candy. Sometimes they would even ask for money. One year, there was one little kid that had to be 100lbs or more. The poor kid pretty much just waddled. And his freaking parents were DRIVING him from house to house. :fie:
There were also tons of 11-16 yr old girls that would dress up as trashy as they possibly could. If I had been their dads, they would not have left the house.
Now I live out in the country. The only kids that come by are my next door neighbor's kids. But they are over at our house every time we are outside anyway so it really isn't any different than a normal day other than the costumes. I just let them have whatever candy they want and I eat whatever is left over. :)
Doc Safari
10-15-14, 09:22
Trick or treating is a perfect way to spread Ebola.
Just sayin'...
When I lived in the suburbs, I used to dread Halloween. Some of the trick or treaters were in their 20's or so it seemed...masses of them.
Now, and for the past 8 years I live way the hell and gone out in the country.
My very lard yard is completely fenced in with a 36' gate at the entrance.
Not one trick or treater has ever darkened my door step since moving here.
Yaaaaaaaaaaah!!
When I lived in the suburbs, I used to dread Halloween. Some of the trick or treaters were in their 20's or so it seemed...masses of them.
Now, and for the past 8 years I live way the hell and gone out in the country.
My very lard yard is completely fenced in with a 36' gate at the entrance.
Not one trick or treater has ever darkened my door step since moving here.
Yaaaaaaaaaaah!!
It's sad, because when I was younger and lived in a different place, Halloween was always a lot of fun. Handing out candy while sitting home watching old Universal Horror movies just reminded me of the fun I had as a kid.
I wish Halloween was still like it was.
Moose-Knuckle
10-16-14, 02:04
Trick or treating is a perfect way to spread Ebola.
Just sayin'...
I was thinking the same thing. The wife and I wanted to go to the State Fair of Texas this year, we have since made other arrangements . . .
I used to enjoy treating the little cuties. Now it's 90% van loads of immigrants from outside the neighbor hood followed by late hour low-lifes with little or no costume. I read a Kindle in the back bedroom with the lights off during the rush. Old guy in old neighborhood. My much younger sisters in farther out suburbs still have a fun night.
Trick or treat should get pretty interesting in colorado this year.
Failure2Stop
10-16-14, 20:53
Trick or treating is a perfect way to spread Ebola.
Just sayin'...
I just figured out what I'm giving kids for Halloween!
We don't do Halloween, for a few reasons. This year we'll turn out the lights and watch TV.
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