Crow Hunter
07-31-19, 17:43
Let me set the stage for you:
I have several coworkers that are Feel the Bern superfans. They wear the T-shirts they pretty much repost everything he says. They constantly rail about the have and the have-nots and how unfair American capitalism is. They have been with the company for years, decades actually, and have worked hard to get to where they were and are very good at their jobs.
Here recently my company called a meeting. The company leaders spoke about how they had a meeting and were going to move to a "more fair" bonus system.
Previously we had a bonus where company would allocate $X to bonuses and your amount was based on your pay and the number of months you had worked for the company. Someone who had been there 20 years was getting a pretty hefty bonus compared to someone newly hired, even if the new hire had a higher base salary.
I looked over at my coworkers who were beaming and smiling huge smiles, undoubtedly in anticipation of the "fairness".
Announcement:
New bonus calculation will be
$X bonus allocation / number of employees = bonus amount
So everyone gets the same, no matter if you have worked there 2 days or 40 years.
The look on their faces was PRICELESS!!! I literally laughed out loud. The chatter afterward was even better.
"That isn't fair!"
"I have worked really hard to get this!"
"Why should XXXX get the same as me, I am much more important and valuable to the company than the woman that cleans the bathrooms or the guy that mows the lawn!"
It was GLORIOUS.
Especially when I would walk by them as they were huddled together fuming and gnashing their teeth and whisper. Feel the Bern bitches!! How you like that Socialism now?
The indignation, the stammering, the red faces will live with me forever.
I had one guy try to argue with me that this wasn't Socialism because "he wasn't rich". To the guy with 1 year bonus and your 22 year bonus, you are the rich one. You always wanted the "rich" to share and pay their fair share. Welcome to your fair share. And by the way, thanks for contributing to my now much higher bonus.:cool:
I have several coworkers that are Feel the Bern superfans. They wear the T-shirts they pretty much repost everything he says. They constantly rail about the have and the have-nots and how unfair American capitalism is. They have been with the company for years, decades actually, and have worked hard to get to where they were and are very good at their jobs.
Here recently my company called a meeting. The company leaders spoke about how they had a meeting and were going to move to a "more fair" bonus system.
Previously we had a bonus where company would allocate $X to bonuses and your amount was based on your pay and the number of months you had worked for the company. Someone who had been there 20 years was getting a pretty hefty bonus compared to someone newly hired, even if the new hire had a higher base salary.
I looked over at my coworkers who were beaming and smiling huge smiles, undoubtedly in anticipation of the "fairness".
Announcement:
New bonus calculation will be
$X bonus allocation / number of employees = bonus amount
So everyone gets the same, no matter if you have worked there 2 days or 40 years.
The look on their faces was PRICELESS!!! I literally laughed out loud. The chatter afterward was even better.
"That isn't fair!"
"I have worked really hard to get this!"
"Why should XXXX get the same as me, I am much more important and valuable to the company than the woman that cleans the bathrooms or the guy that mows the lawn!"
It was GLORIOUS.
Especially when I would walk by them as they were huddled together fuming and gnashing their teeth and whisper. Feel the Bern bitches!! How you like that Socialism now?
The indignation, the stammering, the red faces will live with me forever.
I had one guy try to argue with me that this wasn't Socialism because "he wasn't rich". To the guy with 1 year bonus and your 22 year bonus, you are the rich one. You always wanted the "rich" to share and pay their fair share. Welcome to your fair share. And by the way, thanks for contributing to my now much higher bonus.:cool: