View Full Version : Handgun for the wife
I did a search but could not find a thread for this topic. I have like one shot at getting a pistol in my wife's hands. I just would like to know what weapon the women in your life carry. I am thinking about getting a glock 19 or Taurus PT709 for her to try first.....your opinions are welcome, also if I have missed other threads may you post the links? Thanks guys
Only a few pages away.
https://www.m4carbine.net/showthread.php?t=40174
Has she shot a S&W J frame? (ie. 642)
Sometimes semi-autos are harder for women, the slide moving throws them off.
Only a few pages away.
https://www.m4carbine.net/showthread.php?t=40174
Has she shot a S&W J frame? (ie. 642)
Sometimes semi-autos are harder for women, the slide moving throws them off.
Thanks for the link, and nah, she has only held my .45. I am also a newb to handguns, and sadly, most of my info is from the net, that said most of the comments I have read regarding revolvers for first time shooters has not been positive.
John_Wayne777
11-01-09, 23:13
J frames get a lot of recommendations for women. Personally speaking, I don't get it.
The J frame is a great little weapon for what it is...but it's probably THE hardest handgun to master out of any on the market. It's also put every woman I've ever seen try one off of shooting the weapon. If your wife will carry something like the Glock 26 or an M&P 9C then she would be far better off with one of those pistols as opposed to a J frame as her primary.
There's nothing wrong with revolvers per se, but a scandium .357 is not something most women (or men, frankly) are going to train with.
My wife shoots a Browning BDA 380 w/ nickel finish, which she likes because the nickel is sexy-looking and it fits her hand like a glove. I personally think it'll be a poor carry gun (she's awaiting issue of her concealed pistol permit) and am trying to get her transitioned to a short .38 special revolver. I say don't overthink it... it's tough to beat the simplicity and reliability. I also agree that no one enjoys training on a small frame .357, but my opinion is the .38 special's recoil is just lighter enough to keep it fun.
S&W, Taurus, and Ruger all make good enough ones that are close to the same and all pretty affordable. If you've really only got "one shot" then I say don't worry about getting the "right" one... just get one that will work well enough to get the job done.
Regardless of revolver or semi, from my experience you also need to make sure she likes how it looks before you buy it. You and I might think that Glock (or whatever other gun) is awesome because of feature x, y, and z... the women in my life might understand all those features, but because it's butt ugly they never really get as excited to shoot it as we want them to be. That means less training, which means less proficiency, which means a problem.
So the gun she thinks looks nice might not be the tactically appropriate warrior weapon we want them to have, but if she's excited to practice with it then it'll be a better overall pick. Again, don't worry about getting the right one, just one that'll do the job well.
[QUOTE=rackham1;486870]
You and I might think that Glock (or whatever other gun) is awesome because of feature x, y, and z... the women in my life might understand all those features, but because it's butt ugly they never really get as excited to shoot it as we want them to be. That means less training, which means less proficiency, which means a problem.QUOTE]
LOL!!!! +1!!!! She saw a pic of the PT709 and her eyes went wide "Ahhhh pretty" LOL!!
On the revolver issue, if she fires it and doesn't like it I have lost her that's another reason why I am not too keen on a revolver.
On the revolver issue, if she fires it and doesn't like it I have lost her that's another reason why I am not too keen on a revolver.
Fair enough... if she's that much on the fence then better not chance it. Too much risk that it could turn her off like John_Wayne777 said he's seen. My only test subjects are my own wife and family but they've done a fair amount of shooting.
So sounds like you're zero'ing in on it... the PT709! :)
By the way, is this for concealed carry, or the nightstand, or the glove box, or just for fun?
For carry, and nightstand. I work nights and have a good deal of night classes, and she is about to start traveling for her job. So it'll have to do double duty.
Georgie Boy
11-02-09, 00:18
One thing I like about starting females, who are questioning a handgun, with a revolver is ease of use. Yeah, reloads are slower, but start her off with an auto that she can't work the slide, or one that keeps stove piping due to limp wristing, and you'll turn her off even more. I'd say start her with a smith mdl 60 or somethin similar. A j-frame sized revolver is small enough that she could see herself carrying, full steel frame with longer grips will make it a little more comfortable to shoot, and can shoot .38 spec. The airweights and airlights are great carry guns, but until you get used to em, practicing kinda sucks.
John_Wayne777
11-02-09, 07:07
I would STRONGLY recommend something like a G26 or an M&P 9C over a Taurus anything. While I know of some Taurus semi-autos that work, they are not known for their quality or reliability.
One advantage of the G26 is that you can buy an Advantage Arms .22LR kit for it that will allow you to put the same sights you like for the weapon for carry...so she gets to practice with a very soft recoiling pistol that has the same sights and trigger as the one she carries every day. That's the most bang you can possibly get for your training buck.
One key aspect to getting non-shooters into shooting is how you present it. I like to make at least the first few outings fun outings. I like to have them shoot weapons that are easy to shoot, don't recoil too much, and then if they're into that they can work their way up. I like to use reactive targets so they can see something more exciting than just a hole in a piece of paper. Bags of potatoes, apples, and similarly robust bits of vegetation make for excellent reactions when shot, and are 100% environmentally friendly.
While it's great fun to shoot that stuff you're also teaching them to shoot at a very small target. Hold an apple up to your chest and ask yourself what vital organ you have that is about the same size....
If you work some formal drills into the mix with some pure fun you'll keep their attention and interest. If they look forward to going to the range and don't see it as work, you've won the battle.
J frames get a lot of recommendations for women. Personally speaking, I don't get it.
The J frame is a great little weapon for what it is...but it's probably THE hardest handgun to master out of any on the market. It's also put every woman I've ever seen try one off of shooting the weapon.
So true. As another option my other half found the Sig P239 much to her liking as it fit her hands perfectly with the short trigger. It was one I picked up in early 1998 however, and was flawless for my purposes.
There, I blew my lurker status.
montanadave
11-02-09, 10:15
Not the most popular choice, but my wife has a Ruger LCR with Crimson Trace grips. It's light, small, fits easily in her purse, pocket, or jocky box. Safe, decent trigger, manageable recoil. And the BIG plus--it's a revolver!
She has rheumatoid arthritis which makes working the slide on an auto problematic, especially in cold weather. And it's cold a good part of the year in our neck of the woods.
I'm planning on getting an M&P 9 for my wife from Grant at some point. She's small framed and has no problem with this 9. She's ok with the medium back strap I use but the small may be better for her. That's a nice option to consider. I thought maybe the recoil would be too much for her but it's really a soft shooter, she could shoot it all day. We looked at Kahr but the M&P slide is much easier for her, that was an issue to consider here.
I've learned some hard lessons in trying to find a handgun that my wife enjoys shooting and that she will carry on her person.
Grip size in general, and the circumference of the grip from backstrap to trigger at rest in particular, are critical for my wife. If it's even a little too big for her she won't shoot it much. The Glock 19 and 17 are too big for her; the S&W j-frames, Kahr PM9, 1911, and Kel Tec P32 fit her hand well.
Recoil and muzzle blast are issues for my wife. She can handle a .22 LR (S&W 317) or .32 ACP (Kel Tec P32) for an extended shooting session. An S&W 649 (all stainless steel) with standard pressure .38 won't tire her out so much that she won't shoot more than 20 rds in a session. A S&W 642 airweight has too much recoil for her. The Glock 19 has too much felt recoil for her but part of that issue could be that the grip is too big for her hands.
Hand/grip/arm strength can rule out some autos. She can't rack the slide on a Kahr P9, K9, or PM9, even after trying the various methods suggested for women. She can rack a 1911 but the weight of an all-steel 1911 fatigues her quickly. She can rack a G19 but the grip's too big.
Some folks (some women included) won't alter their wardrobe to carry so this can limit carry method choices to those that are applicable only to very small, very light guns. She couldn't find a way to carry a S&W 649 on-body and still dress the way she wants to dress. The 649 was simply too big and heavy for her to be willing to carry it, likewise 1911s.
Physical build issues can impact weapon choice. My wife is short in the torso so even a 2" barreled j-frame Smith is too long for her to carry comfortably in a belly band at 12 o'clock. Some women do well with appendix IWB carry; others' builds fit better with 4-5 o'clock IWB carry. It seems that few can do 3 o'clock IWB carry.
Right now, my wife's on-body carry gun is a Kel Tec P32 in a belly band. The gun's recoil is light; the gun is narrow, light, and short in length and height; it fits her hand well enough; she's comfortable carrying it in a belly band. In a belly band the P32 doesn't print and she doesn't have to modify her wardrobe to carry it. She can access the gun with either hand while moving. She willingly carries and shoots it and does pretty well.
She's expressed interest in an ankle holster for it so we'll see how that goes. (She wears pants more than skirts, but of course ankle carry has its own issues).
Yes, I'd be a lot happier if she could/would carry a Glock 17/19/etc, but that just ain't gonna happen.
Anyone have experience with the new Sig 238, or seen/talked with women that have shot it? I read one good review but that was the only feedback I've seen so far... if my wife wants to stick with the .380 I might look into the 238 over her BDA.
I've got a kel-tec pf9, wife can't work the slide. She's tried the p32 and can't work that one either. I picked up a near mint astra cub for a song a year or so ago. Not sure how much protection a 22 short would be, fun to shoot though. She'd probably have to empty the clip as fast as she can then run, and hope the assailant doesn't feel good enough to chase her...;)
The G19 is an awesome choice. The G26 would be a good compromise, similar to the one I make off duty with my G27. The G19 offers more ammo and the ability to attach a weapon light. The G26 would be better for carry and you could stick a G19/17 mag in the weapon when it was in home defense mode and boost your ammo on board. When I carry my G27 I carry a G22 mag as a reload. There is a second in the center console of my truck too along with a speed loader for my 340PD for the days I carry it. I am not sure what her method of carry will be but the G26 would give her serious stopping power in a more concealable package but there is no light mount. It is all what works best for her. The G19 would be better to fight with because of the weapon light and increased round count but it will do her no good if it is left behind.
I would bring her out to the range and teach her the basics. My wife learned to shoot on my Sig P220 .45 and she is little. The problem she ran into was learning to manipulate the slide. We worked on it and she was fine. I work with a 100# female cop who is 5'01" and she carries a Glock 22 .40. The only accommodation she needed was a different UBL (universal belt loop) for her Safariland ALS holster so the draw angle was correct for. She also needed a DG switch for her Surefire X300 because her hand is too small to manipulate the standard controls. If your wife can shoot a full-size gun that is what you should buy her. Get it with night sights and a weapon light too if you can. I'm not sure what you are carrying but if you could go with something similar that would be helpful too for compatibility and if you ever need to use each other’s weapons. I would go with a 9mm or .40. They offer you a great stopping power with the right ammo and a huge selection of ammo and accessories when necessary. I carry a G22 at work and a G27 as a back up and off duty weapon. I’ve semi retired my S&W 340PD in .357 but it came out yesterday when I needed a smaller lighter gun.
[QUOTE=rackham1;486870]
You and I might think that Glock (or whatever other gun) is awesome because of feature x, y, and z... the women in my life might understand all those features, but because it's butt ugly they never really get as excited to shoot it as we want them to be. That means less training, which means less proficiency, which means a problem.QUOTE]
LOL!!!! +1!!!! She saw a pic of the PT709 and her eyes went wide "Ahhhh pretty" LOL!!
On the revolver issue, if she fires it and doesn't like it I have lost her that's another reason why I am not too keen on a revolver.
Buy some pink Krylon or Duracoat for her new G19. Paint it pretty. I've used krylon never duracoat.
http://www.duracoat-finishes.com/
Not sure how they painted this:
http://www.thefirearmblog.com/blog/2009/10/15/dpms-panther-lite-special-pink-edition-ar-15/
M4tographer
11-02-09, 21:36
[QUOTE=Shaolin Giraffe;486876]
Buy some pink Krylon or Duracoat for her new G19. Paint it pretty. I've used krylon never duracoat.
http://www.duracoat-finishes.com/
Duracoat was easy and she loves it. Gotta make it appealing since guns are typically loud and ugly. ;) This is the lady's daily carry piece...Glock 19 done in Duracoat 'Pink Lady' color. Tough as nails and 'pretty'. She liked my Glock 23 but wasn't interested in her own until I showed her what could be done with a little special paint. The rest is history.
http://philmarek.smugmug.com/photos/684798994_aTXX4-L.jpg
MarshallDodge
11-02-09, 21:51
Don't buy her anything. Take her to the local range that rents and let her shoot all of them until she finds one that SHE likes.
Man that is your wife's new G19! My daughter wants one. Do you need to use heat with the Duracoat? I agree if you can get to a range where rentals are an option do it. When I lived in MA it was an option I do not know of any here in VT but if it's an issue for you go shooting with friends. What ever you do make sure safety comes first. Teach her right she might end up out shooting you and that is okay.
I have a S&W model 60, the wife dry fired it once, said she didn't like the trigger pull and that was that. She'll shoot my G19 but won't fire one round from that revolver. So, I would not recommend a j-frame to start out on from my personal experience. But I told my wife to pick what she wants and try my best to inform her about her choice and let her go from there.
Jeremy45
M4tographer
11-02-09, 23:20
Man that is your wife's new G19! My daughter wants one. Do you need to use heat with the Duracoat?
Without cluttering the thread too much, no there isn't heat involved. Couple coats of white, wait a couple days, a few coats of pink. Ready to assemble in a day and ready for 'extreme use' in 3-4 weeks. The finish just gets better and better as time goes by. I used a $13 airbrush from Harbor Freight with a cheap regulator and shop air at work.
I've run a concealed carry class for women, and I can tell you that it can be difficult teaching most women to shoot. The dilemma, as already stated, is that semi-autos are easier to shoot well, but revolvers are easier to operate.
When teaching a woman new to shooting, its a good idea to let her dry fire various handguns and see which she is comfortable operating. A mechanically inclined woman may favor a semi-auto. For semi-autos, I've found that exposed hammer models are sometimes easier as she can manually cock the hammer making the slide easier to retract. I once had a 9mm Tokarev that my wife had an easy time operating. I would think that the narrow slided 9mm's like a Hi-Power or 9mm 1911 would be easier for a woman to operate. A nightstand semi-auto can also be left in Condition 3 with the hammer cocked making it easier to rack a round into the chamber. Its important for the semi-autos to be well de-horned so that she doesn't cut herself on it.
Once she has picked a platform (revolver or semi-auto) get a .22LR or Airsoft gun in that type. This will allow her to practice the fundamentals without the recoil or muzzle blast. I've found that most women are better students than most men and that they do very well with the light recoiling pieces. Have them shoot some type of reactive target - even aluminum cans are good if you have nothing else - so that they get immediate feedback and positive reinforcement. Once they are confident and tell you they are ready, then introduce full power handguns.
The fact is that most women will only try shooting to appease their male counterparts. The second that it is too intimidating, uncomfortable, or embarrassing for them they will drop it and never try again. If you're not willing to spend the time and money to do it right, your chances of success are pretty low. Proceed with caution.
SWATcop556
11-03-09, 01:36
Renting different guns that the range is a good idea. I do not recommend a revolver either.
My wife had zero interest in shooting until I showed her a duracoated pink G19. I made the first few range sessions "fun" by starting her with a Ruger 10/22 and some steel animal targets then we worked up towards the hanguns.
She liked the size and feel of the G26 but the recoil was a little snappy for her tastes. She's only 5'04" 120 lbs. She made the compromise on the size and went with the G19 and shoots it very well. It does double duty as a nightstand gun while I work graveyards and also a purse gun.
Bottom line is get them something they like and will carry otherwise it will get left behind. Better to carry something than nothing at all.
She has been eye-balling a M&PC here lately though. I've created a monster I think. :D
YammyMonkey
11-03-09, 01:42
My wife really likes her M&P9 JG. The pink grip insert helps.
If I were in your shoes I would flat out tell her that it might not be all that fun the first few times while you guys work out what she likes & dislikes. If there’s something that she enjoys doing but that takes some time & trial & error try to relate it to that. If she likes shoes :rolleyes: it might take her all day to find a pair that she likes & will work for her. Same deal here.
Plugs & muffs for ear pro & tell her to keep her mouth shut when she’s shooting. Big hole in front of face helps transmit sound to rest of head.
Keep it simple & reward small advances. If she can rack the slide give her some encouragement & tell her she’s doing well. If she hits the target 3 out of 10 tries focus on those three. There are a lot of guys out there with lots of guns who can barely swing that.
You’re both new to handguns. Consider taking a class together. Even a simple NRA Basic Pistol class will help her get more comfortable & learn about the things. If you’re in the class just be quiet & ride along. She doesn’t need an instructor telling her one thing & you telling her something else. Realize that you will most likely not be able to train your wife. They don’t listen to us & if we tell them to do something odd or uncomfortable they just won’t do it for the most part. If a third party tells her to do it she probably will. I don’t know if it’s a perceived authority/SME thing or what but for the most part that’s the way it works.
If you’re going to buy anything right now get her a .22. Most are relatively light, cheap, cheap to shoot & easy to learn with. You both can get a lot out of a .22. Once she’s comfortable there start looking at other things. I would much rather have a student who can shoot .25 splits into a face size target with a .22 use that than a 9mm or larger that they can barely hold minute of man with.
Finally, you NEED her buy-in on this. If she’s just going out to appease you & doesn’t think it’ll be at least moderately enjoyable you’ve probably already lost. She has to want to do it.
If your wife was gung-ho about shooting then some of the above would be different.
i know a few ladies at the range who shoot M&P's very well. if the glock is too chunky i'd go M&P. plus... pink back strap... the ladies can't resist :D
Thanks for the input guys. We are going to take a class, I already did the NRA first steps but we are going to do a private lesson together. I am under no illusions so I won't even TRY to be her teacher LOL!!! Sadly the only range here that I have found has an ABISMAL rental selection.
SWATcop1911~I would LOVE it if she could outshoot me. I am trying to get her into the gym w/me as well. The day she can choke me out would be the happiest day of my life :D. I figure if she can beat me she could stand her own in the street.
Well guys, thanks again and Doran thanks for blowing your lurker status!!!
Please keep the comments comming guys. We are not going to buy until early nxt year so the more input I can get the better.
dirksterg30
11-03-09, 10:53
Anyone have experience with the new Sig 238, or seen/talked with women that have shot it? I read one good review but that was the only feedback I've seen so far... if my wife wants to stick with the .380 I might look into the 238 over her BDA.
My wife has one, and she loves it. We're still breaking it in, but it has been flawless so far. Very accurate, with useful sights (her previous gun was a Kel-Tec P32.) I'd prefer she go with a larger caliber, but at least she's carrying a gun. She's also very proficient with my M&P9/9c, but that's more of a house gun for her.
SIG had an issue with the 238 when it first came out; apparently, if the thumb safety was not properly engaged and the trigger was pulled, the hammer could fall when the safety was lowered: http://www.sigsauer.com/customerservice/p238upgrade.aspx. Fortunately, my wife's P238 is not affected by the recall.
Shaolin Giraffe, you may want to have your wife check out this website, put together by a woman for women. My wife found it very useful: http://www.corneredcat.com/TOC.aspx#FirstGun
Shaolin Giraffe, you may want to have your wife check out this website, put together by a woman for women. My wife found it very useful: http://www.corneredcat.com/TOC.aspx#FirstGun
Copy that. Thanks dirksterg
First post here. Having given several ladies their first shooting lesson, I suggest the following:
The suggestions above to try out guns before buying are important. She will surprise you with her choice.
As a general rule, the difficulties of racking the slide and loading the magazine are much easier to overcome than the difficulties of a DA trigger. Proper technique will aid racking the slide, while a magazine loading tool will make loading the magazines much easier for her. However, a S&W K-frame .38, fired single action, can make a good training tool.
Be careful about having your wife try a lightweight .38 J-frame or similar gun - the recoil is comparable to a .357 magnum in a larger gun even with standard pressure .38 spl.
About 40% of the ladies I have taken shooting have had difficulty with trigger pulls of 9 lb. or higher (including the NY trigger that I used to use on my Glock 26). If you can keep the trigger in the 4-7 lb. range, it will be much easier for her to shoot well.
Although ladies typically have smaller hands, they also have less meaty hands, so a lady with the same size hand as a man will be able to wrap her and farther around a grip than the man.
My wife does some of her best shooting with her Springfield XD9, but most commonly carries a Kel-Tec P-32. Other good choices would include a Glock 19 or 26, 1911 (particularly in 9mm), HK P7, Sig P239 with DAK trigger, Beretta 92, Bersa .380, or Sig P232.
Ultimately, she will probably need three guns: a full size gun for training and home defense, something as small and light as possible while still having reasonable firepower and stopping power for concealed carry (Glock 26 or similarly sized gun), and a true pocket gun for those times when nothing else can be concealed.
Be sure to tell her not to lock her elbows while shooting. A female arm is a bit crooked, and has some reverse curvature in the elbow, when the elbow is locked. A slight bend in the elbow will significantly improve her comfort.
When selecting holsters for her, keep in mind that her hips are curved, the distance from her waist to her arms is short, and the distance from her waist to her hips is long, as compared to a similarly sized man. I have watched numerous ladies struggle with high-ride, FBI cant holsters. Consider something with more of a vertical cant, possibly worn closer to (or even in front of) the 3:00 position on the hip (belt buckle is 12:00). Also consider shoulder holsters - particularly those that have a figure-8 harness that will keep the pressure off the back of her neck.
Some suggestions for holsters:
LadyFist
http://www.fist-inc.com/holsters/lady/Default.htm
Kramer Sheepskin clip IWB (although it does have an FBI cant)
http://www.kramerleather.com/productDetail.cfm?productID=4&categoryID=23
A bellyband taking advantage of a natural space in the clothing, such as this holster:
http://www.guns4gals.com/Holsters.html
Finding concealed carry options is particularly difficult for a lady, and is a very common topic of discussion here: http://womenandguns.servertalk.in/index.php
Hope this helps.
misanthropist
11-03-09, 14:31
This is NOT a recommendation; I have never shot one. But I recently handled a Ruger SR9 and thought, man, if I had small hands I would be all over this thing. It just disappeared in my Costco-sized mitts, and it was SUPER comfy.
My GF usually shoots a 686 Classic Hunter - 6" full underlug barrel, unfluted cylinder...serious tank - but wants a 9mm for a more practical defensive gun.
I can't get her interested in a Glock..."too square and blocky, too ugly".
Whatever it is, it has to be pretty. Well, that narrows the field (and rules out the popular choices here...no MP9s either).
And preferably it has to be shiny. Well, the SR9 has my attention. I know there was a recall (it's a Ruger) on early models but I am hoping the later ones will perform well.
Anyway as I say this is NOT a recommendation to BUY an SR9 but is it worth researching one? Maybe people who have run them a bit might have some useful information.
Unfortunately it is new enough (especially in Canada) that I have not run across a lot of reveiws.
ETA: specifically, I have not seen reviews from reviews I know enough to trust.
FlyAndFight
11-03-09, 15:20
My wife went with a G26. She was comfortable and confident in shooting it.
In the end, the only person who can choose the right pistol for your wife is your wife. Just like we can't say, "guys do best with brand-x/model-a," we can't say that for chicks, either. My wife, who has average sized hands for a girl, will tell you that she shot the 92G Beretta better than any other gun she's used. The gun was objectively too big, the trigger pull was objectively too heavy (on the DA shot), etc. Yet she shot it very, very well. Conclusion: Don't jump to conclusions about what gun is best for a girl.
Anyone who thinks a .38 Sp out of a lightweight revolver is easier to shoot than a 9mm out of a decent semiauto is on crack. That doesn't make the revolver a bad choice, but opting for it out of recoil management concerns is backwards.
The other issue to keep in mind is skill realities. Is she going to practice once a week? Once a month? Once a year? At a certain point, lack of skill makes all guns equally sucky. For someone who is going to put effort into getting decent and maintaining proficiency, new factors come into play.
A girl walking around with a .32 Kel-Tec in her purse -- like a dude walking around with a .32 Kel-Tec in his pocket -- is better off than someone who isn't carrying a gun at all. Would it be my choice for EDC CCW? Hell no. But would I choose one over going out with no gun? Hell yeah.
If she's going to be a shooter get her a shooter's gun. If she's not, get her the gun that she'll actually learn how to operate, remember how to operate, and then carry every day. Cliche as it sounds, having a gun is priority #1.
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