PDA

View Full Version : How to get the wife interested in shooting???



P2000
02-05-11, 21:23
I hear some people are able to get their wife or gf to take an interest in shooting. Some lucky individuals have posted that their significant others even grab their carbine and go shooting on their own! I have taken my wife shooting about 4 times, but every time it is like I have to convince her to go. I am not pushy, or demanding, I just try and make it fun in hopes that she will take some type of interest. If she would take an interest, she could have any equipment, any training she wanted. Anything!

The most I have been able to get her to do is pretend there was a threat, and run to where I keep hidden a pistol, and grab it....She is horrible with that pistol!

I am thinking of buying her a CX4 carbine for her birthday to get things started(she is. a recoil sensetive lefty), but I don't know if it will just be a waste.

My goals are for her to be at least half way competent on defending herself when I am away so that we have a little bit of understanding and peace of mind, serving some type of defence role if I am home, and just having fun if we go shooting.

I don't know why she doesn't like shooting, just like she doesn't know why I don't want to make earrings?

Anyone have some insight or experience in this matter?

Hot Holster
02-05-11, 22:26
My daughter wasn't too happy shooting until one day I used the shoot and see targets. She thought that was the neatest thing since peanut butter and jelly. She said now that she can see where the shot is hitting it makes it all worthwhile.

Maybe it's just the llttle things

bnanaphone
02-06-11, 08:12
Another first gun option could be a .22 rifle (IE 10/22). It has no recoil, and costs very little to shoot. It may reduce or eliminate tje recoil sensitivity. Taking that out of the equation will allow her to enjoy things more and focus on making hits.

I use to own a CX4 and while it does have little recoil, a 10/22 has none. I tried taking my wife shooting. Started with a .22 pistol, then 9mm, .40 and .45 auto. She hated the noise most of all, followed by the gun's recoil. No luck for me.

Good luck and get her comfortable with a little gun before moving up, baby steps.

sewvacman
02-06-11, 08:14
With my wife I just put a couple of pumpkins out and handed her a loaded sks. I still remember the smile on her face and that was almost 20 years ago, her only question was "How many pumpkins do we have?", and whatever # it was not enough.

Have you tried just simply going with a 22 plinker, like a 10/22, m&p15 or walther p22. Something she can go all Rambo with and not feel any recoil. Not ideal for self defense, but it does bring it down to the basic joy of shooting without the recoil, noise or expense, and the aiming carries over to the big guns

That said she hates ALL of my larger caliber handguns except an old walther p38 (which is a joy to shoot I will admit) so that is what is on her side of the bed. (along w/ a 20 gauge shotgun) She hates recoil as well but is willing to practice with just about everything we have as long as it is not too painful.

P2000
02-06-11, 12:41
Some good ideas so far, thanks.

She has shot my 10/22 each time we have been shooting. She kinda had fun, but not enough to want to go shooting again. I'm thinking if she has her own rifle, she may take more of an interest. I would like to get something new, rather than another 10/22.

I like the pumpkin idea, she might like that.

czydj
02-06-11, 13:03
Have you tried to take her out gun shopping and let her pick what she wants? If she's not even interested in shopping, I'd say you have a long row to hoe.

Hmac
02-06-11, 13:03
Ain't gonna happen, I bet. Some people just aren't interested in some things.My wife is quite the horsewoman and I couldn't possibly be more indifferent to the horse world. I will go out and watch her compete, but she knows that that's as much interest as I can fake, and I do it because I love her and respect her. But it's not a hobby or passion that we're ever going to share. She accepts that.

How many parents have demanded/ordered/wheedled/cajoled their kids into piano lessons? Sure, some kids take an interest and become musicians, but that happened because they had uncovered an innate interest in music, not because someone made them be interested.

I suspect you're in the same boat relative to your wife and shooting. The one thing that probably is important is that if there is going to be a gun in the house, everyone that lives there has to know the rudiments of gun handling. That's where my wife and I started. She subsequently came to acknowledge a pistol as a reasonable means of self-protection and she came to recognize that there are conditions she occasionally faces where personal protection is important. While firearms certainly aren't a passion of hers, she feels strongly that if she's ever going to carry a gun to protect herself, she will train and practice with it sufficient to make sure she can do so competently.

Militant83
02-06-11, 18:37
Take her out and let her shoot some higher power firearms if you have access to some. And be creative and get something fun for her to shoot at not just a bullseye. I bet some tannerite would do the trick if she doesnt have fun shooting and blowing something up then you could probably forget about it. Or stress to her how important it is for her to learn how to shoot in a self defense aspect. And that in order to get better she needs to shoot frequently.

All I had to do for my wife is get her a couple guns of her own. I let her design her first custom 10/22 that I built. Ended up being pink and black with skulls. But it was hers and she loved it and has had fun shooting ever since, except for shotguns.

PRGGodfather
02-06-11, 18:44
Speaking only for myself, while it is critical my wife support my affliction for all things that go boom -- there are times when a man has to spend some man time alone.

Love her totally. Still need my own time, thanks.

Suwannee Tim
02-06-11, 20:44
....I am thinking of buying her a CX4 carbine for her birthday to get things started(she is. a recoil sensetive lefty), but I don't know if it will just be a waste......

No problem there! If you don't want it, send it to me! I can't count all the guns I bought for my wife that she had no interest in.:D So I have to shoot them to keep them from getting lonely.


Seriously, she doesn't shoot with me much, three or four times a year and that mainly to keep up proficiency. Prior to me embarking on my latest shooting binge we spent all most all of our free time together, too much really, weeks at a time in the wilderness. You may have to find something else you both like and do that, shooting with the wife being an occasional thing. We know many couples who spend NO free time together.

ROCKET20_GINSU
02-07-11, 02:23
My wife did not warm up to shooting and firearms in general until I started showing her the world of competitive shooter, specifically USPSA pistol. She was really drawn to the idea of competition and shooting as a sport and gave. Prior to competitive shooting she saw guns as a strictly violent affair.

+1 on the .22 lr and taking her out to pick what she wants. The M&P 15-22 is a pretty good place to start looking. Also consider having someone else "teach" her, sometimes it can be difficult to take instruction from someone very close to you. And finally, find a way to empirically show her improvement.

Good luck, I can tell you that the getting my wife to share the sport of shooting with me was extremely rewarding.

GU

Vic303
02-07-11, 10:00
It's also possible she might like SASS. There seem to be a lot of women participating in both the shooting events and the mock-life-in -the-1800's side of things. Plus who doesn't love a nice lever gun??

GitmoSmoke
02-07-11, 19:30
I suggested to my wife that she read the cornered cat, and it worked very well for her. A website that is written by a woman who was anti-gun and now is a firearms self defence instructor. It answered a lot of questions my wife had on her schedule, and in a manner that was easy for her to understand.
http://corneredcat.com/

TacticalTaco
02-13-11, 20:47
Take her to dinner, but before you go to dinner, stop at the range and say she has to put 100 rds down range before lobster.

khc3
02-14-11, 09:16
You must be a newly-wed, LOL.

Shooting is "Me" time.

D Golden
02-14-11, 10:10
My first wife was like that,little to no interest in shooting or self defense for that matter. New wife had interest and potential, just needed training to bring it out of her. We started with my Ruger 22`s, pistol & rifle went all the way up to 12 ga. & 7.62x51 just to familiarize her with these weapons in case she needed to use them in an emergency. What works for her given her stature is a 30M1 carbine and a S&W MP9c.

MechEng
02-14-11, 10:15
To expand upon what khc3 said. Why the hell would you want to get your wife interested in shooting?

In all seriousness, just take her shooting and let her shoot several different firearms. She will either be in-to-it or not…or some level of interest in between.

ST911
02-14-11, 11:21
Sometimes, removing the male variable helps. Even the most well-intentioned significant other can sometimes be the problem.

Contact your state outdoor/wildlife enforcement agency to see what ladies-specific organizations and activities there might be. Contact them for particular information about educational opportunities in the shooting sports.

A good example is Becoming and Outdoors Woman, which often has firearms related events. On this page are links to the BOW program in each state: http://www.uwsp.edu/cnr/bow/

The Second Amendment Sisters organization sponsors events as well, and can be found in many states: http://www.2asisters.org/

Also, check in with your local sporting goods retailer to see what may be posted on their bulletin boards.

In the end, she may not be interested. That's okay. Teach her how to safely handle a gun she may unexpectedly find or encounter, and let her decide where to go from there.

Cowtown44
02-14-11, 11:47
I asked this same question in another forum about 2 years ago. Here's how I/we approached it and what happened. First of all, I decided that I would not be a trainer, only an advisor. I don't have enough experience or patience to be a trainer. I told my wife that I was buying a handgun and she need to attend a safety class with me. This was non-negotiable as she needed to be able to safely handle the pistol.

We signed up for a basic safety class at a local range. The class happened to be taught by a women but I don't think that made any difference. It was a structured classroom experience with about an hour's worth of range time with .22 revolvers and semi-autos. Immediately after the class, she said, "that was fun!". At this point, I seized the opportunity to have her sit down IMMEDIATELY and take the handgun safety test (a pre-requisite for handgun purchase here). The test is basic, common sense and she easily passed. With her new confidence in gun handling and safety, I suggested we go upstairs to the sales shop to "look around".

Open flood gates and check books!

I asked one of the salesman to help her out with choosing a handgun. I didn't chime in much on the selection process as 1) I didn't know much about handgun options for women at the time and 2) it needed to be her choice. She ended up getting a S&W .38 revolver with a 1 7/8" barrel. I know, I know this is the classic exchange between the gun salesmen and new women shooters. "Here little lady, you need a light weight revolver. You know, something you can handle". Anyway, that's what she thought she wanted so we went with it.

We waited the 10 days until she could pick up the revolver. We immediately went downstairs to the range for some shooting. This was almost her last day of shooting. At this point in her shooting career, the recoil of the airweight was too much. I have to admit, it is not much fun to shoot after about 50 rounds. Time for another gun.

We went back upstairs and she bought a S&W 317 22LR revolver. She used the 22LR revolver for several months to learn sight picture and trigger control. The .38 would always go to the range for about 20-40 rounds of shooting. Over time, with improvements in stance and grip, the .38 became a little more manageable for her to shoot but still not "fun".

Time for a rifle.

I signed us up for an Appleseed and bought a couple of 10/22 (with added tech sight irons) as a cheap introduction to rifle marksmanship. We had a good time at the course and after she became relatively proficient with irons, I bought a little rimfire Leupold scope for the 10/22. This added alot to the fun of the rifle as she could take it out farther and see what she was hitting. It also taught her about stable shooting positions and further taught her about trigger manipulation.

Need more training.

I decided I needed basic pistol training so I signed us up for defensive handgun I at Thunder Ranch. I just signed us up, made all the arrangements and told her she'd been signed up for a class. Oh, and she now needed at least a 9mm semi-auto, so she better start renting them at the range and pick the one that felt the best. She ended up picking a full size XD in 9mm. Simultaneously, I bought her a Sig P226 as a present but I did not give it to her until she had the XD. She immediately fell in love with the look, feel and functionality of the Sig and this is the gun she uses today. We had a fantastic learning experience at Thunder Ranch and I highly recommend it if you ever get the opportunity.

Let's go shoot shotguns!

We went out to shoot some trap/skeet/sporting clays. She got an O/U Citori 20g for these shooting sports. This has been the hardest area for her to learn as the targets are moving fast and she hasn't fully developed those skills yet. We stopped shooting the shotgun until I can find a competent instructor for these clay sports. Maybe this spring/summer.

Current status.

We both shot our first IDPA match last Sunday and loved it. We're hooked. We plan to shoot IPSIC as well. Both of us prefer more action and movement versus the static range. We are signed up for another basic handgun course this fall and an advanced handgun and urban rifle course in 2012.

P2000
02-14-11, 21:47
You must be a newly-wed, LOL.

Shooting is "Me" time.

Ha! You caught me...

Really I know she won't ever become my shooting buddy. I just want her to be proficient, be exposed to shooting in general, and posses the skill to defend herself at home if ever needed. In order to do these things I think she has to take at least a limited interest.

She comes from a family that has no idea what violence looks like, never locks their doors, thinks that no one needs a gun, and her sister has said in the past "a gun will only make an out of control situation worse". She knows better because of what I have shown her, but doesn't act on it....yet...

TehLlama
02-14-11, 22:46
.22's and reactive, or the shoot-n-see targets can make it a lot more entertaining.

Vegas
02-15-11, 01:43
.22's and reactive, or the shoot-n-see targets can make it a lot more entertaining.

The last time I took my wife along, she saw someone shooting these targets and said she liked the look of them for the reason you mention. Generally my wife doesn't want to shoot but when I talk her into it, she has had fun. Her biggest problem is the noise. Get a couple of 45's either side of our lane and she's done. She has actually expressed more interest in shooting outdoors because of this and we'll likely give that a try this spring.

As far as gun shopping goes, she has looked and decided she likes .22's for their size and lack of noise which is fine with me if it gets her interested. Once I get my first AR completed, I plan on buying a .22 upper to see if I can get her interested in shooting a rifle :)

The only other gun she has been interested in is a Walther PPK after I told her it was the gun James Bond carries :D She handled one and her face lit up like a christmas tree, perhaps I might surprise her with one, one of these days.

davehk
02-17-11, 21:46
My girlfriend is anti-gun and absolutely hates it when I conceal and carry. It kind of sucks but she got robbed gun point at work (for a lousy 100 dollars) and now she understands why I carry. I told her you have to learn how to shoot cause you never know when your going to need those skills... Shit happens.. Don't be a victim!

Jay Cunningham
02-21-11, 23:04
I hear some people are able to get their wife or gf to take an interest in shooting. Some lucky individuals have posted that their significant others even grab their carbine and go shooting on their own! I have taken my wife shooting about 4 times, but every time it is like I have to convince her to go. I am not pushy, or demanding, I just try and make it fun in hopes that she will take some type of interest. If she would take an interest, she could have any equipment, any training she wanted. Anything!

The most I have been able to get her to do is pretend there was a threat, and run to where I keep hidden a pistol, and grab it....She is horrible with that pistol!

I am thinking of buying her a CX4 carbine for her birthday to get things started(she is. a recoil sensetive lefty), but I don't know if it will just be a waste.

My goals are for her to be at least half way competent on defending herself when I am away so that we have a little bit of understanding and peace of mind, serving some type of defence role if I am home, and just having fun if we go shooting.

I don't know why she doesn't like shooting, just like she doesn't know why I don't want to make earrings?

Anyone have some insight or experience in this matter?

Find someone who is a good shooter, who is switched on - THAT YOU TRUST - and leave her with him for a couple of hours at the range. Sorry dude, but you're a damper on your wife's ability to learn. Happens all the time.

sixgun-symphony
03-04-11, 00:43
Look into Cowboy Action Shooting and the Buckskinner Rendezvous. Both are a great way to get girlfriends, wives, and others into the shooting sports.

Women love the costume and the comradery found in both CAS and Buckskinning.

http://sassnet.com/
http://www.nmlra.org/

Radioflyer
04-19-11, 15:41
Lucky me, my GF was interested in shooting simply because I was. For the most part, your girl will be happy just by you showing her attention. If that includes walking her through the "firearms door" at a comfortable pace, this will not only help her to get acquainted with firearms, but also help strengthen your relationship.

magstang1
04-19-11, 20:12
.22 is a good place to start. Reactive targets, good, good.

Make it fun and easy. Go over all the function and safety of the gun before you get there. Do it a few times.

If she gets overwhelmed when you get there it won't be fun.

Stangman
04-19-11, 20:22
The promise of jewelry. Guaranteed to work. :D



My wife has always been around weapons since her dad was career Army, so I never had to much nudging - thank God. However, one thing that made her actually want to shoot was a simple spinner target & a .22 rifle. She couldn't get enough of that, lol.

pilotguyo540
04-19-11, 20:24
If you got a girlfriend she might get interested in a hurry:sarcastic:

Seriously, Don't push too hard. Plant a seed and let it grow little by little. Start small with a .22, no macho crap. Take her out once for 30 minutes and let it sit for a month or 2. You are married so time is on your side. Jay has the best advise with getting the hell out of the way! I would add, trust only so much, but I am jaded.

In the end, she may never like shooting. That's when the "me time" comes into play. By then, you wont worry as much.

Good luck

usmcvet
04-19-11, 22:15
Well spend some time learning how to make jewelry with her if that's what she likes. Maybe she would like to build a gun or at least customize one with paint. My little girls like their pink guns.