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SteyrAUG
05-20-11, 23:44
Happy Rapture Day (http://www.ebiblefellowship.com/outreach/tracts/may21/)

:jester:

JUDGMENT DAY: MAY 21st, 2011

We know that the year 2011 is the 7000th year from the flood. We also know that God will destroy this world in that year. But when in 2011 will this occur?

TIMING OF IMPORTANT EVENTS IN HISTORY

11,013 BC—Creation. God created the world and man (Adam and Eve).

4990 BC—The flood of Noah’s day. All perished in a worldwide flood. Only Noah, his wife, and his 3 sons and their wives survived in the ark (6023 years from creation).

7 BC—The year Jesus Christ was born (11,006 years from creation).

33 AD—The year Jesus Christ was crucified and the church age began (11,045 years from creation; 5023 calendar years from the flood).

1988 AD—This year ended the church age and began the great tribulation period of 23 years (13,000 years from creation).

1994 AD—On September 7th, the first 2300-day period of the great tribulation came to an end and the latter rain began, commencing God’s plan to save a great multitude of people outside of the churches (13,006 years from creation).

2011 AD—On May 21st, Judgment Day will begin and the rapture (the taking up into heaven of God’s elect people) will occur at the end of the 23-year great tribulation. On October 21st, the world will be destroyed by fire (7000 years from the flood; 13,023 years from creation).

Bowser
05-21-11, 00:42
Can I have your guns and ammo?

variablebinary
05-21-11, 01:43
I have no problem with this planet being obliterated. It was a good run though.

Last call...

SteyrAUG
05-21-11, 01:45
Can I have your guns and ammo?

I'm pretty sure the consensus among most "believers" is that I will still be here.

Bowser
05-21-11, 02:21
Aw, well then, you should post more ninja crack house stories.

Don Robison
05-21-11, 02:26
I'm pretty sure the consensus among most "believers" is that I will still be here.


Dang, I've been sitting up waiting for the end of the world. I wouldn't want to sleep through something like that. Ya' just never know when you'll get to see something that historical again. :sarcastic:

PdxMotoxer
05-21-11, 03:12
so is it going to be destroyed by time zone?
i mean like dropping the ball on new years. :confused:

i have a few friends over in the u.k. who are 9 hours ahead of me here in oregon.


I wonder if those that believe this stuff paid their monthly bills, or made any plans PAST today.

I would have offered them 40 or 50 bucks for their shiny s.u.v.'s they will no longer be needing.

montanadave
05-21-11, 06:58
My understanding is the Rapture is scheduled for 6 P.M. local time (not certain as to whether that is adjusted for daylight savings). Given there aren't any reports of widespread destruction and folks floating up into the sky from Australia, New Zealand, Japan, etc., does this mean another swing and a miss for the Harold Camping?

But I'm sure he just dropped a decimal point or something and another date for doom will be forthcoming. Along with another appeal for generous donations to his Family Media broadcasting and publishing conglomerate, with assets estimated at around $100 million. :rolleyes:

Armati
05-21-11, 07:37
The sad thing is a lot of these clowns have sold everything, quit their jobs, have no plans or financial support past today. Many of these people have kids.

montanadave
05-21-11, 07:48
The sad thing is a lot of these clowns have sold everything, quit their jobs, have no plans or financial support past today. Many of these people have kids.

Oh, not to worry. I'm sure the good Reverend Camping will see that his flock is properly cared for and compensated for any financial losses they may have suffered based on his scriptural interpretation. :jester:

Cobra66
05-21-11, 08:05
Another Christian from a Christian denomination (2nd largest in the world) that doesn't buy into this moron's prophesying.

Here in the FRY - there is thankfully no mention of all of this buffoonery and only when I link up back with home am I reminded of this doomsday cult.

See all of you tomorrow.

montanadave
05-21-11, 08:10
For those still on the fence, here's an instructional video outlining proper Rapture etiquette and social guidelines:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hmX-lZOYcVA

M4C members might want to pay particular attention to item #3 in the video-- the prohibition against going on killing sprees, settling blood feuds, etc. :no:

Karl Marx might have had his head up his ass about a lot of things, put the quip about religion being "the opium of the people" was right on the money. But, hey, sheep were made to be shorn, right?

HES
05-21-11, 11:49
I'll take a pass and do the Rapture Orgy party instead.

FromMyColdDeadHand
05-21-11, 11:51
The sad thing is a lot of these clowns have sold everything, quit their jobs, have no plans or financial support past today. Many of these people have kids.

The leader supposedly has $72 million. If he hasn't drained his bank accounts, he's not down with the program.

Damn, and I had 7pm dinner reservations.

Voodoochild
05-21-11, 13:43
It is currently 6:45 Liberia time and so far status quo....

Bubba FAL
05-21-11, 15:01
Any "Christian" that claims to know when the world will end or the Rapture will occur (if you take that part of Revelation literally)... is quite simply, a heretic.

Search the scriptures, Jesus Himself said that "only the Father knows". There are many good reasons for people not to know when the end will come, only that it will.

LHS
05-21-11, 15:41
The real reason we avoided the Rapture today...

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h103/LordHeadshot/MachoManPreventsRapture.jpg

OHHHHHHHH YEEEEAAHHHHH!!!

PdxMotoxer
05-21-11, 16:07
These night shifts are throwing my world off..... i didn't get up till after 1p.m. today and feared i musta slept through the rapture and missed it.

I seem to miss all the good things being on this schedule.
When is the next time the world is coming to an end? 2012?

I'll set my alarm clock so i don't sleep through another one.

(if i lived anywhere close to Harold Camping or his "flock" i would
HAVE to have a few "I Survived the 5-21-11 Rapture" T-Shirts made up) :laugh:

LOKNLOD
05-21-11, 16:42
The real reason we avoided the Rapture today...

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h103/LordHeadshot/MachoManPreventsRapture.jpg

OHHHHHHHH YEEEEAAHHHHH!!!

That is AWESOME...but totally wrong. The truth is, Macho Man is going to be God's tag team partner for Armageddon! His passing signals the end is near!

Moose-Knuckle
05-21-11, 17:12
I know most people think that Harold Camping is insane, stupid, or both. But I got to hand it to the old boy, how much money has he raked in over the years selling his "product"?


P.T. Barnum There is a sucker born every minute.


Chicken Little The sky is falling!

Avenger29
05-21-11, 17:27
I know most people think that Harold Camping is insane, stupid, or both. But I got to hand it to the old boy, how much money has he raked in over the years selling his "product"?

I've met a lot of Christians that will fall for anything if you drop the name "Jesus" in front of them...they become 100% trustful when you claim to be religious. That's the type here that are "following" Camping...

Gullible idiots...

BCmJUnKie
05-21-11, 17:31
I know most people think that Harold Camping is insane, stupid, or both. But I got to hand it to the old boy, how much money has he raked in over the years selling his "product"?

I used to go to church alot when I was younger. My mom and Aunt are big into it. I also picked up a few things from it. It says for one, that NO ONE knows nor WILL they know, in fact it states "When you LEAST suspect it.

Honu
05-21-11, 17:53
I've met a lot of Christians that will fall for anything if you drop the name "Jesus" in front of them...they become 100% trustful when you claim to be religious. That's the type here that are "following" Camping...

Gullible idiots...


Sadly many people are gulible drop anything in front of it ?

Typical sad response though to bash a religion rather than something constructive ?
Funny the left uses this tactic also when they have nothing solid they start to name call and bash ?

Signs of idiocy some say :)

kaiservontexas
05-21-11, 18:06
Got to love the defrocked Anglican and his heresy.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Nelson_Darby

Before him the rapture did not exist in any Christian teaching.:jester:

But you know what . . .

Here is to finally having a face to face fight with the demonic. *raised glass*

Of course that is not happening today.

FromMyColdDeadHand
05-21-11, 18:07
If God directly talks to you and tells you to do something, wait to get it in writing- preferably on stone tablets, with duplicates in case somebody loses or loots the originals.

Avenger29
05-21-11, 18:37
Sadly many people are gulible drop anything in front of it ?

Typical sad response though to bash a religion rather than something constructive ?
Funny the left uses this tactic also when they have nothing solid they start to name call and bash ?

Signs of idiocy some say :)

I'm not bashing religion (I'm a Christian myself, just not a gullible idiot like some...Bible didn't say nuttin' about giving up common sense). I'm just pointing out that there are a lot of Christians who will fall for anything if you drop the J-word in front of them because they are that trusting and/or clueless...

LOKNLOD
05-21-11, 18:49
I'm not bashing religion (I'm a Christian myself, just not a gullible idiot like some...Bible didn't say nuttin' about giving up common sense). I'm just pointing out that there are a lot of Christians who will fall for anything if you drop the J-word in front of them because they are that trusting and/or clueless...

And the real tragedy of these false predictions is that every time the fools cry wolf, the rest of the world has a big laugh about it, and it undermines the whole of the teachings of Christ.

Spouting end times prophesy to non-believers can be rather like trying to convince Sarah Brady of the merits of HPT and MPI for AR bolts. You're going to need buy-in at a much broader level before you get that far into the details.

sdcromer
05-21-11, 21:22
Well I have clean undies on just in case ;)

SWATcop556
05-21-11, 21:48
Shit. I'm still here.

Scoby
05-21-11, 21:49
See yall tomorrow. :D

SteyrAUG
05-21-11, 21:51
So I spent all day today at the Exxxotica convention and not one person got raptured. Not even the religious protesters outside.

:D

montanadave
05-21-11, 22:06
So I spent all day today at the Exxxotica convention and not one person got raptured. Not even the religious protesters outside.

:D

Attending primarily the seminars or just enjoying the stage performances? :laugh:

Jellybean
05-21-11, 22:51
I've met a lot of Christians that will fall for anything if you drop the name "Jesus" in front of them...they become 100% trustful when you claim to be religious....
Gullible idiots...

And sadly, I've personally known at least two so-called Christians that have taken advantage of this to screw people over....:mad:
Never fails to refresh the concept of 'a sucker born every minute'.


And the real tragedy of these false predictions is that every time the fools cry wolf, the rest of the world has a big laugh about it, and it undermines the whole of the teachings of Christ.

So true.
No man knows the day or the hour.

11:52 EST, and I'm still here...:rolleyes:

SteyrAUG
05-22-11, 00:30
Attending primarily the seminars or just enjoying the stage performances? :laugh:

Both, and doing some networking. And taking lots and lots of pictures. I have a case of strip club overload that will probably take a few days to wear off. It got so bad that one of the girls at the penthouse booth was changing her outfit and it took me a few moments to realize she had nothing on.

SteyrAUG
05-22-11, 00:33
And the real tragedy of these false predictions is that every time the fools cry wolf, the rest of the world has a big laugh about it, and it undermines the whole of the teachings of Christ.


Honestly, if you believe it then that should be all that matters. I try not to worry about the opinions of others or seek their validation of my beliefs. And only very specific evidence is going to change my beliefs.

variablebinary
05-22-11, 01:43
Bummer. I was looking forward to seeing the planet get cracked in half.

QuickStrike
05-22-11, 01:44
I recall seeing two big ole billboards about this.

I wonder how they're going to explain this one. :D

FromMyColdDeadHand
05-22-11, 02:28
I'm not dead yet... (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sh8mNjeuyV4)

montanadave
05-22-11, 07:50
Both, and doing some networking. And taking lots and lots of pictures. I have a case of strip club overload that will probably take a few days to wear off. It got so bad that one of the girls at the penthouse booth was changing her outfit and it took me a few moments to realize she had nothing on.

Best wishes for a speedy and full recovery. And it seems the powers that be have granted you the necessary days to heal up.

I gotta admit, selecting a contemporary "Sodom and Gomorrah" as your venue to witness the onset of the final judgement and all is a gutsy call.

QuietShootr
05-22-11, 08:46
To no one's great surprise, I'm still here.

montanadave
05-22-11, 11:17
So I guess this means Scotty will still be around for the American Idol finale?

SteyrAUG
05-22-11, 11:52
I recall seeing two big ole billboards about this.

I wonder how they're going to explain this one. :D

God's mysterious ways.


Best wishes for a speedy and full recovery. And it seems the powers that be have granted you the necessary days to heal up.

I gotta admit, selecting a contemporary "Sodom and Gomorrah" as your venue to witness the onset of the final judgement and all is a gutsy call.

If there is such a thing as a God, he'd know what I think and feel regardless of where I was. And if being a good person who likes naked girls condemns me, well I'd rather hang out with the other good people who like naked girls anyway.

Honu
05-22-11, 13:27
I'm not bashing religion (I'm a Christian myself, just not a gullible idiot like some...Bible didn't say nuttin' about giving up common sense). I'm just pointing out that there are a lot of Christians who will fall for anything if you drop the J-word in front of them because they are that trusting and/or clueless...

maybe I read it wrong then ? I hear ya and agree about common sense :) and I guess I mean idiots are idiots no matter what word you drop in front :)

then again I should say I have never been around those types maybe ? so they could exist I guess :) if so thats sad in a way

then again I look at seniors who get scammed by people in the news and think how could they have gotten this far in life ?

toasterlocker
05-22-11, 14:45
And sadly, I've personally known at least two so-called Christians that have taken advantage of this to screw people over....:mad:

My dad always used to say whenever someone described themselves as a "good Christian" the first thing he would do is reach for his wallet to make sure it was still there. This coming from someone who ushered nearly every Sunday and made me go to Church school/confirmation until I left the house.

There are hucksters and frauds in every religious group, and will not hesitate to take advantage of the more gullible members of those groups. Just look at all of our own crooked politicians who go on and on about their "faith."

SteyrAUG
05-22-11, 14:55
There are hucksters and frauds in every group, and will not hesitate to take advantage of the more gullible members of those groups. Just look at all of our own crooked politicians who go on and on about their "faith."

Fixed

toasterlocker
05-22-11, 15:05
Fixed

Agreed.

Abraxas
05-22-11, 15:26
It is currently 6:45 Liberia time and so far status quo....
How would anybody in Liberia know the difference between normal and end of the world?

ThirdWatcher
05-22-11, 15:40
My dad always used to say whenever someone described themselves as a "good Christian" the first thing he would do is reach for his wallet to make sure it was still there.

I totally agree... I'm a work in progress.

montanadave
05-22-11, 16:34
How would anybody in Liberia know the difference between normal and end of the world?

Touche'

kry226
05-22-11, 16:40
I'm not bashing religion (I'm a Christian myself, just not a gullible idiot like some...Bible didn't say nuttin' about giving up common sense). I'm just pointing out that there are a lot of Christians who will fall for anything if you drop the J-word in front of them because they are that trusting and/or clueless...
I wouldn't necessarily call those folks gullible. I'd be more apt to call them ignorant. Ignorant because they haven't read the Word. Everything Camping has done is contrary to Biblical teachings.


Actually, I recant that. He's right in line with warnings about false prophets.

JSantoro
05-22-11, 22:07
How would anybody in Liberia know the difference between normal and end of the world?

No khat.

Rider79
05-23-11, 15:26
The world was supposed to end on October 22nd..... 1844.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Millerism

SteyrAUG
05-23-11, 16:59
The world was supposed to end on October 22nd..... 1844.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Millerism

It's funny, if you read the original link, they have the date at OCTOBER 21st, 2011. Some people never learn.

I honestly can't fathom devotion to a religious belief that states God loves you but is going to whack you (and most of the rest of humanity and all other life on the planet) out on a given date.

Even if I actually believed it was true, I don't think I'd want to be in heaven with such a sadistic deity. I think I'd rather cease to exist.

montanadave
05-24-11, 07:13
It's funny, if you read the original link, they have the date at OCTOBER 21st, 2011. Some people never learn.

I honestly can't fathom devotion to a religious belief that states God loves you but is going to whack you (and most of the rest of humanity and all other life on the planet) out on a given date.

Even if I actually believed it was true, I don't think I'd want to be in heaven with such a sadistic deity. I think I'd rather cease to exist.

I couldn't agree more. The whole faith through bribery and threat doesn't set real well with me. My perpetually inchoate conception of a higher power is far more expansive than the common anthropomorphic god which, to me, seems nothing more than a "superman" who embodies all of the very best of our human attributes... and all of our worst.

But back to Mr. Camping, who has (SURPRISE!) moved the goal line yet again: http://www.nytimes.com/2011/05/24/us/24rapture.html?_r=1&hp

And, in an even more shocking revelation, Camping has no plans to give back any of the money he racked in. From the article cited above:

"But Mr. Camping said his company — which is a nonprofit — would also not return donations given by his followers in advance of the May 21 prediction. “We’re not at the end,” he said, 'Why would we return it?'"

What a hump!

5pins
05-24-11, 08:06
And, in an even more shocking revelation, Camping has no plans to give back any of the money he racked in. From the article cited above:

"But Mr. Camping said his company — which is a nonprofit — would also not return donations given by his followers in advance of the May 21 prediction. “We’re not at the end,” he said, 'Why would we return it?'"

What a hump!

I have a hard time feeling sorry for anyone stupid enough to give him money.

JSantoro
05-24-11, 08:52
To think, we still have the 2012 Mayan-calendar "doomsday" whackadoos to deal with....

montanadave
05-24-11, 08:58
To think, we still have the 2012 Mayan-calendar "doomsday" whackadoos to deal with....

Necessitating, I assume, a paradigm shift amongst believers from a "holier than thou" attitude to a "more pagan than thou" position. :shout:

SteyrAUG
05-24-11, 12:31
To think, we still have the 2012 Mayan-calendar "doomsday" whackadoos to deal with....

Crap, now I have to find another porn convention in Dec.

Artos
05-24-11, 13:13
sorry AUG...time to start worrying again.

http://www.foxnews.com/us/2011/05/23/preacher-got-date-apocalypse-wrong-tries-says-months/

JSantoro
05-24-11, 13:46
Huh. I see a resemblance.

Face that looks like he's been bobbing for deep-fried shrimp....check.

Ears that remind one of a car coming down the road at you with both doors open....check.

Poor facial hair decisions (braided chin-beard for one, mutton-chops for the other)...check.

Folks fall for their BS....check.

http://mktplassets.xbox.com/NR/rdonlyres/979033A8-BFE3-45BC-8B08-32E5CF8BEA46/0/ilmprophets.jpg

SteyrAUG
05-24-11, 14:35
Huh. I see a resemblance.

Face that looks like he's been bobbing for deep-fried shrimp....check.

Ears that remind one of a car coming down the road at you with both doors open....check.

Poor facial hair decisions (braided chin-beard for one, mutton-chops for the other)...check.

Folks fall for their BS....check.

http://mktplassets.xbox.com/NR/rdonlyres/979033A8-BFE3-45BC-8B08-32E5CF8BEA46/0/ilmprophets.jpg

http://www.newprophecy.net/Marshall_Applewhite_is_back.jpg

Artos
05-24-11, 18:42
http://www.newprophecy.net/Marshall_Applewhite_is_back.jpg

reminds me of the guy who was the villian in the 2nd or 3rd poltergeist movie.