CPS visit Number #4

[Belmont31R]

:p;):)

[Magic_Salad0892]

Why does it always seem like CPS is always investigating the wrong person?

Your kid slips and busts his head. Full CPS investigation.

My girlfriend's mother does drugs with her kids in the house. Second oldest (my girlfriend) is taking care of the youngest, while the oldest is working.

Even after a criminal offence by the mother, and a trip to rehab.

Mother doesn't have custody of any of the kids now though. But that's because she dissapeared, and has only been spotted every now and again at bars in CA. This was a number of years ago.

No CPS investigation.

I don't get it.

Take care, Belmont.

[GermanSynergy]

Why does it always seem like CPS is always investigating the wrong person?

Your kid slips and busts his head. Full CPS investigation.

My girlfriend's mother does drugs with her kids in the house. Second oldest (my girlfriend) is taking care of the youngest, while the oldest is working.

Even after a criminal offence by the mother, and a trip to rehab.

Mother doesn't have custody of any of the kids now though. But that's because she dissapeared, and has only been spotted every now and again at bars in CA. This was a number of years ago.

No CPS investigation.

I don't get it.

Take care, Belmont.

Amazing how that works, eh? Sort of like the parents that send their kids to school hungry, etc never seem to get visited by CPS.

Sorry to hear, Belmont.

[ReaperAZ]

This makes me so mad reading stuff like this. Accidents happen and just as you said, "kids will be kids."

I wish you the best and hope things turn out in your favor. CPS can be one of the biggest jokes. This is just another horror story that I have heard about them.

[Belmont31R]

:p:p:p:p

[Smuckatelli]

:) ;) :p

[montanadave]

Stop bringing up the beer, take it out of any discussion involving this issue. Eventually they will make you feel guilty about drinking a beer. You know you don't have a problem, no one has identified you as having a problem. Work hasn't identified you with a problem.

It ain't a problem, stop drawing attention, eventually it will become a problem if you keep doing this.

Had had to see a shrink 3 times before they would finally grant my TS SCI. The above was his advice to me after our third talk.

Pretty sound advice.

Spending a lot of time defending your alcohol use and denying it's an issue is like waving a red flag in front of folks who interact regularly with substance abusers.

I'm one of those mandatory reporters that has been mentioned and I have been employed in the substance abuse treatment field. Getting defensive about your alcohol use is just shooting yourself in the foot.

Like it or not, the general consensus is most parents, if their alcohol use (regardless of whether it is an issue or not) was raising suspicions and creating problems would simply choose something else to drink.

[Belmont31R]

Pretty sound advice.

Spending a lot of time defending your alcohol use and denying it's an issue is like waving a red flag in front of folks who interact regularly with substance abusers.

I'm one of those mandatory reporters that has been mentioned and I have been employed in the substance abuse treatment field. Getting defensive about your alcohol use is just shooting yourself in the foot.

Like it or not, the general consensus is most parents, if their alcohol use (regardless of whether it is an issue or not) was raising suspicions and creating problems would simply choose something else to drink.






I can understand a drunk getting defensive but people who are also not a drunk, and basically get accused of it and have their kid asked questions over their head about it will also will get defensive. She seemed to make it a point which is why I brought it up, and explained it here. I mean she asked him maybe a couple questions about how he got hurt and then changed the subject to what I have to drink. I had no problem telling her Id just had a drink when she came to the door, and that she could probably smell it. Im bringing it up because she asked more questions about what I drink than about how my kid got hurt, and since Im explaining what happened its going to get brought up. It seemed to be more about me possibly having an alcohol issue than why my son ended up in the hospital. Thats it...:D

[sammage]

Some of the elements remind me of this..sounds like you were spot on in protecting your rights, and your family's.

http://www.lewrockwell.com/grigg/grigg-w106.html

[FromMyColdDeadHand]

So fast forward to Sunday evening. Ive recently, within the fast few months, started a salt water tank. I have some fish, some live rock, some shrimp, some crabs, snails ect

Dude, that's not a fish tank- it's dinner!

Didn't you have some ATF guys at your house too about your 'Assault Weapon Arsenal'? You are going to have to put out waiting numbers or a sign that says "Gov't Officials form line here".

Wife is a pediatrician and thank goodness for HIPPA so I don't have to hear all her stories anymore ;) , but Magic_S is right, they never seem to investigate the right people.

Have you asked her why you only seem to abuse one of the two kids, who are twins? Ever think about putting Cam in a helmet?

My 3 year old daughter fell out of her chair twice at one dinner last month and just seemed to fall over at random for while. Some kids just are gravity challenged.

[tgace]

My suggestion.

Talk to an attorney if you can afford to and stop talking about this incident in particular and your personal life (drinking) in general on a public internet forum.

Others MMV.

[Belmont31R]

My suggestion.

Talk to an attorney if you can afford to and stop talking about this incident in particular and your personal life (drinking) in general on a public internet forum.

Others MMV.



Nothing I said here didn't get said to the CPS worker yesterday so it doesn't really matter.

[Iraqgunz]

Belmont,

First off. Sorry that you had to experience the wrath of the CPS Gestapo. It's pretty sad that they can't understand that kids get hurt. I know I did alot of stuff when I was younger that scared the shit out of my mom, grandmother, etc...

I even experienced an incident of my own when one of my twin boys somehow managed to open our front door in base housing and was running around outside. We never heard a peep until someone knocked on the door.

But, tgace and a few others make a good point. I would stop discussing the beer and I would refrain from posting on the net. I wouldn't be surprised if they were possibly monitoring and or trying to find about more about you and the Mrs.

I wonder where CPS was when that rotten twat murdered her daughter Caylee? Where were they when some asshole microwaved his baby during his meth high? Sometimes life sucks and the good ones get targeted.

[Belmont31R]

Dude, that's not a fish tank- it's dinner!

Didn't you have some ATF guys at your house too about your 'Assault Weapon Arsenal'? You are going to have to put out waiting numbers or a sign that says "Gov't Officials form line here".

Wife is a pediatrician and thank goodness for HIPPA so I don't have to hear all her stories anymore ;) , but Magic_S is right, they never seem to investigate the right people.

Have you asked her why you only seem to abuse one of the two kids, who are twins? Ever think about putting Cam in a helmet?

My 3 year old daughter fell out of her chair twice at one dinner last month and just seemed to fall over at random for while. Some kids just are gravity challenged.



Ha..yeah I need to put one of those ticket things out front, and start taking numbers. The constable has been here twice looking for my sister who doesn't live here, and once for my BIL who also doesn't live here. I don't have much contact with them but gave them their current address. The ATF came because I bought some handguns and AR's. Crazy world we live in....:D

[montanadave]

I can understand a drunk getting defensive but people who are also not a drunk, and basically get accused of it and have their kid asked questions over their head about it will also will get defensive. She seemed to make it a point which is why I brought it up, and explained it here. I mean she asked him maybe a couple questions about how he got hurt and then changed the subject to what I have to drink. I had no problem telling her Id just had a drink when she came to the door, and that she could probably smell it. Im bringing it up because she asked more questions about what I drink than about how my kid got hurt, and since Im explaining what happened its going to get brought up. It seemed to be more about me possibly having an alcohol issue than why my son ended up in the hospital. Thats it...:D

I understand your position and empathize with your frustration.

But I also know how the game is played. CFS is investigating the possibility of child abuse/parental negligence and, unfortunately, due to the nature of your son's injuries, you're on their radar. And alcohol abuse goes hand-in-hand with child abuse. Alcohol use in the home is going to draw scrutiny, justified or not. Don't feed the beast.

[tgace]

You don't find the "real bad guys" unless you investigate. Not laying any accusations here at all (and im no huge fan of CPS based on some things I've seen) but EVERYBODY claims that they are innocent. If we went by peoples word all the time we would never catch the the people we finally manage to catch. While it's nervewracking, im confident that if everything is as you say it is, things will eventually return to normal.

[Belmont31R]

Belmont,

First off. Sorry that you had to experience the wrath of the CPS Gestapo. It's pretty sad that they can't understand that kids get hurt. I know I did alot of stuff when I was younger that scared the shit out of my mom, grandmother, etc...

I even experienced an incident of my own when one of my twin boys somehow managed to open our front door in base housing and was running around outside. We never heard a peep until someone knocked on the door.

But, tgace and a few others make a good point. I would stop discussing the beer and I would refrain from posting on the net. I wouldn't be surprised if they were possibly monitoring and or trying to find about more about you and the Mrs.

I wonder where CPS was when that rotten twat murdered her daughter Caylee? Where were they when some asshole microwaved his baby during his meth high? Sometimes life sucks and the good ones get targeted.



Thanks but Ive already told her I what Ive said here so its nothing new to them. Im not worried anything will come from this. If I was Id be much more careful about posting anything and most likely wouldn't at all.


Its not so much targeting. Its mandatory investigation whether there is cause to believe abuse is happening or not because of his age and being a head injury. No matter what they would come out. This is why the truly shitty parents get away with what they do because they have people going to homes wasting their time. (ETA: With the mandatory investigation thing they are investigating every situation in which a kid gets hurt and has to be taken to the doctor no matter if there is cause to believe abuse is happening or not...you could be at the playground in front of 50 people and they would still investigate.) I mean if they really thought we were a danger to the kids they wouldn't have let us leave the hospital with them.


And just read in the paper today a guy in my town got arrested for sexual assault of an 11 year old girl that was living with him, and it went on for months. He had also been questioned before about possible assault on another kid but nothing came of it.

[HES]

Im sorry you are going though this shit storm. Like others have said, drop the beer comments. In FL a DCF case worker is supposed to be accompanied by an LEO. The courts here have ruled that since children are involved and may be endangered, that the case worker and LEO can enter a residence with out a warrant and may interview a child with out the parent present. So good for you for being able to keep them out.

I've had CPS (DCF in Florida) called on me 5 times due to my vengeful bitch-in-law. All 5 times the case worker has left shaking their heads wondering why the hell they were called out to begin with and apologizing for having disturbed us and wasting our time. So I completely understand your frustration at having to even endure this. The one bit of advice I have is to make sure that even if you are only being firm with the case worker, just be gently firm. Yeah it galled me but these are folks who have a lot of power and sometimes you have to play the game. For instance when asked if I drink my stock answer is "one or two beers a week." and then I move on from there. Yeah I do get all indignant from the question and I would love to do nothing more than says "none of your ****ing business". But I controlled how I reacted to the inquiry for the sake of my family. That's what ya gotta keep in mind man, how to play the game. Blow off your steam here (ok idea) or your buddies (best idea).

Interesting that CPS made you change your deadbolts. Under FL code is that the inside face of a dead bolt cannot be keyed so that if the occupants have to evacuate they wont be trapped. I would check with what your local building code says about lock types and if CPS is ignorant of the law. At the end of the day I hope your back gets better and life takes a turn for the better.

[Belmont31R]

Like it or not, the general consensus is most parents, if their alcohol use (regardless of whether it is an issue or not) was raising suspicions and creating problems would simply choose something else to drink.




Ive thought about this statement last night, and today, and just wanted to raise a thought for you.


My gun purchases raised suspicion of the ATF...does that mean I should stop purchasing hand guns and semi auto rifles, and choose something else to shoot? BTW I didn't let them in the house, either.

[montanadave]

Ive thought about this statement last night, and today, and just wanted to raise a thought for you.


My gun purchases raised suspicion of the ATF...does that mean I should stop purchasing hand guns and semi auto rifles, and choose something else to shoot? BTW I didn't let them in the house, either.

We all assess the pros and cons of our actions and behaviors and make informed decisions as to those we wish to perpetuate and those we may wish to forgo. If a careful cost-benefit analysis indicates some behaviors are going to cost us something of greater value, we would reasonably choose that which holds greater value and cease the behavior.

Like a fellow I know used to ask, "Is the juice worth the squeeze?" Sure, an individual may have a "right" to do this or be legally permitted to do that, but life isn't always fair and those actions, while perfectly legitimate, may result in that individual incurring negative attention and consequences, justified or not. Sometimes we are forced to choose between being right or being happy.

In the unlikely event you were forced to choose between having a beer or losing custody of your children, I'm guessing you'd skip the beer. While I don't see that happening, trying to prove a negative (e.g. "I don't have a drinking problem") can be problematic. Thus the suggestion to minimize references to alcohol and avoid drawing any further attention to the subject.

The question regarding the ATF is a bit of a red herring, as (I assume) you have done nothing illegal and can answer whatever inquiries they may have without fear of adverse consequence.

I understand the point you are trying to illustrate with the ATF example. One should not be coerced into giving something up merely through the threat of scrutiny by this or that government agency. But, as I have previously alluded to in both this post and my earlier comments, alcohol abuse is a huge red flag in child abuse investigations and quickly draws A LOT of attention. If alcohol use should become an issue in your situation, you'll have to decide whether its worth the additional scrutiny or not.

And just a word of caution, "going to the mattresses" with CFS about your right to have a beer once their suspicions have been raised is very likely to elicit a "me thinks he doth protest too much" type of response.

[Belmont31R]

We all assess the pros and cons of our actions and behaviors and make informed decisions as to those we wish to perpetuate and those we may wish to forgo. If a careful cost-benefit analysis indicates some behaviors are going to cost us something of greater value, we would reasonably choose that which holds greater value and cease the behavior.

Like a fellow I know used to ask, "Is the juice worth the squeeze?" Sure, an individual may have a "right" to do this or be legally permitted to do that, but life isn't always fair and those actions, while perfectly legitimate, may result in that individual incurring negative attention and consequences, justified or not. Sometimes we are forced to choose between being right or being happy.

In the unlikely event you were forced to choose between having a beer or losing custody of your children, I'm guessing you'd skip the beer. While I don't see that happening, trying to prove a negative (e.g. "I don't have a drinking problem") can be problematic. Thus the suggestion to minimize references to alcohol and avoid drawing any further attention to the subject.

The question regarding the ATF is a bit of a red herring, as (I assume) you have done nothing illegal and can answer whatever inquiries they may have without fear of adverse consequence.

I understand the point you are trying to illustrate with the ATF example. One should not be coerced into giving something up merely through the threat of scrutiny by this or that government agency. But, as I have previously alluded to in both this post and my earlier comments, alcohol abuse is a huge red flag in child abuse investigations and quickly draws A LOT of attention. If alcohol use should become an issue in your situation, you'll have to decide whether its worth the additional scrutiny or not.

And just a word of caution, "going to the mattresses" with CFS about your right to have a beer once their suspicions have been raised is very likely to elicit a "me thinks he doth protest too much" type of response.



All Im saying is people should not be scared into not doing legal activities because an alphabet agency shows up at their door, and me getting a visit under Gun Runner is a perfect example. There have been people in open carry states getting harassed and imprisoned over lawful carry. I just don't think laying down and resorting yourself to made up rules is the right course of action, and if no one stands up then those lawful activities, no matter what they are, and will by default become illegal when no one challenges them. Id made my mind up a long time ago over what course of action Id take.



Not doing a lawful activity, no matter what is is, because some gov worker doesn't like it does not make law.