Since your'e capable of great things start by pulling your head out of your ass.
Are your thoughts absolutely true?
The problem is you believe your own BS thoughts. You cannot distinguish the truth from the repetitive drama. It sucks you in every time.
The hopelessness is your thoughts. Your'e creating the nightmare.
Step back and observe the horror film thats playing in your head and see it for what it is.
Here is a little clue, thoughts are not reality...