My ex, who got me into shooting, had me start off with larger calibers, his philosophy at the time was learn the hardest first. (40 then 45 for pistol).
I had a wonderful instructor at the time that I learned the basics with and didn't struggle or develop bad habits with shooting larger calibers. He taught me solid marksmanship that shooting .45s was the only thing I knew. I didn't pick up a 9mm until this year after being a shooter for 9 yrs already.
I still prefer .45 over 9mm and think that's its silly for some men(especially the ones in guns stores) to think all women can handle is a pink .22

My 1911 TRP is my favorite, although my HK45c is known as "my beloved"
My first rifle experience was with an LMT MWS.......again my ex's philosophy to learn the hardest first.......now admittedly that is way too heavy for me to shoot standing for more than a 30rd mag or 2, I do like shooting it bench rest or prone.
But that was just me, I like to do hard stuff and don't get intimidated easily. I think most ladies should start off small and easy, whether it's .22 or 9mm. The key is to make their first experiences safe, fun, and full of proper instruction.
Anyone that gives a new shooter a gun (desert eagle) or 12 ga shotgun that is going to potentially hurt them or others because they think it funny is just deplorable.
I know I would have been way to afraid to shoot if the first time I got injured.
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