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Thread: Civility (aka the "We Will Crush Your Balls" edict).

  1. #1
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    Civility (aka the "We Will Crush Your Balls" edict).

    Gentlemen,

    I suspect that more than few of us went to Sunday School as boys, and as such, we should be reasonably familiar with the principle of treating others as you would have them treat you. Even if you never stepped foot in Sunday School, the truths here are pretty self-evident.

    We're having a problem around here lately. It's not the spiraling downfall in post quality. It's not the influx of new members who don't yet seem to understand what we're all about. It's not the general rise in white noise. It's not the resurgence in tin-foil hat conspiracy posts. It's not the fellows that have been posting increasingly goofy rifles in the home build section. It's not even the emergence of guys who happen to have particularly strong opinions about the current administration or the latest push for gun control legislation in whatever form.

    The problem we're having lies with the otherwise peaceable folks who seem to think that their fellow members no longer deserve a measure of basic respect if/when the opinions of said members diverge from their own dearly-held beliefs (on whatever the topic). We've been very clear on the fact that bitter debates, personal attacks, name calling and baiting will not be tolerated, but apparently the message has grown stale with age. Kindly allow me to freshen it up slightly in the interest of maintaining the peace around here.

    If you disagree with a point another member has made, you may freely engage his facts or issues and make your points. If you belittle him as an individual in the process, or otherwise imply that he is intellectually-deficient in some way, we will crush your balls.

    If you call another member a name in a manner that is in any way interpreted as hostile or sarcastic (because sarcasm is a huge accelerant -- if not the most volatile of them all), your balls will be summarily-crushed.

    If you get into a heated debate with another member that even slightly resembles an open argument (or is laced with the aforementioned sarcasm), go ahead and slap 'em up on the table, because we're going to crush them.

    If you direct profanity at another member with even mild ill intent, kindly drop trou. Your balls? Yeah, we're crushing them.

    If you happen to think that your position(s) and/or belief(s) on a matter are so sacred as to create immediate offense if/when you encounter someone who might feel differently, do not respond to them. If you do, you will almost surely project an air of ire and intolerance. At that point, you may consider your balls as good as crushed.

    I could go on, but I believe the point has been gently made. The staff has been instructed to be on watch for this kind of behavior, and to root it out without a lot of discussion; especially in the near-term. If you happen to wade into those waters anyway, and you happen to have balls ... well, you know the rest. Please take it like a man, and avoid the grousing and protests.

    Clear, brothers? Let's make an active effort to "be at peace with all men," and put away any personal gripes we may have against another member. If that approach leads you to take one on the chin when you did nothing to deserve it, let us know and we will take whatever action is necessary to restore tranquilly. Hint: your tormenter's balls, and the crushing thereof, will almost certainly be involved.

    This is a professional resource: let us have no more of this sixth-grade crap.

    Please and thank you.

    AC
    Stand your ground; don't fire unless fired upon, but if they mean to have a war, let it begin here. -- Captain John Parker, Lexington, 1775.

  2. #2
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    Awesome. You could also just close down GD, ya know

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    We know, Bax, we know ... but the hard lessons of the past tell us that killing GD would just result in these OT discussions spilling over into the more technical areas of the site, which is even less acceptable than the troubles we're dealing with right now.

    Truth be told, I'm not a hard-liner kind of guy at all, and the above was written with at least some passive aggresive nod towards humor; that said, we are serious about this, and we've got to get a handle on the bickering. It is beneath the quality standards of the site, and it is dragging all of us down with it.

    Members are getting knotted up over it, the staff is running around all over the place trying to referee the skirmishes, and (probably worst of all) new guys are seeing this stuff go down and assuming that M4C is just another Internet free-fire rant zone.

    We can do better. We must do better.

    Guys that would share their ammo or canteens with any of their fellow members here suddenly want to punch some of those same dudes in the nose because of some goofy position on a social, religious or political issue? That's truly not seeing the forest for the trees.

    The view is always better from the high ground.

    AC
    Stand your ground; don't fire unless fired upon, but if they mean to have a war, let it begin here. -- Captain John Parker, Lexington, 1775.

  4. #4
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    I think this is what the staff has to do if nuking GD from orbit is not an option.

    Are there any thoughts on those forum members that post solely in GD?

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by Littlelebowski View Post
    Are there any thoughts on those forum members that post solely in GD?
    I can speak only for myself here, as I'm not aware of any particularly recent staff discussion along those lines. Personally, if a guy only cares to populate GD, he's probably missing the whole point of this resource, but that (in and of itself) doesn't necessarily mean he's contributing to a problem, or that he should be rooted-out and discarded. The manner of conduct is still what we will tend to use as the GO/NO GO standard in those cases.

    What it does mean is that he's chosen to focus on a fairly high-risk area at the expense of far more important ones, and sooner or later, he is likely to get so accustomed to the bickering that he will inadvertently become a part of the problem himself. Not really because that was his intent; just because he's made a habit of staying in an area that sees more than its share of daily train wrecks.

    We see much the same thing with members who have a habit of unusually-high posting activity (i.e. the guys who seem to comment on everything just to keep themselves entertained). At some point, some of these guys get so far out of their lanes that they throw out dialogue that simply begs to be beaten down and/or corrected. Again, no malicious intent, but the end result is still discord.

    We try to stay focused on the content that shows up on the boards, rather than the individuals who put it there. When the content is not acceptable, or it marks an open invitation for a skirmish, we deal with the member(s) responsible; that said, we don't want to make this stuff any more personal than the guy on the receiving end wants to be singled-out or infracted.

    This is why we keep hammering away at the idea that is isn't who you are or what you believe that creates friction; it's how you present your views, and -- here's the real kicker -- how you respond to others who may feel quite differently. We all tend to be fairly passionate about those things that matter most to us, but there is a fine line between suggesting an alternate point of view, and going for the throat of someone with whom you cannot seem to see eye-to-eye.

    Some guys aren't aware of that line; others simply choose to ignore it. Both are ripe for involuntary compression of their man sacks.

    AC
    Stand your ground; don't fire unless fired upon, but if they mean to have a war, let it begin here. -- Captain John Parker, Lexington, 1775.

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    Thanks for the reminder Chuck! And I apologize that my thread was no doubt a contributing factor to your posting this topic

    ETA: I browse many media outlets and usually watch 2-3 (even CNN) to get my news. I like to get it from all biases. Given that, I enjoy I GD for getting news as well; primarily since we are all like-minded and the productive discussion that can ensue. That said, I don't think I'd be for nuking GD.
    Last edited by munch520; 05-24-13 at 11:40.

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    A/C-
    I love your posts man. They always make me laugh my arse off!

    I agree, GD should remain. It is a wonderful forum to gain insight into others views/opinions, share thoughts and cross reference information.

    The fact that some cannot maintain an adult attitude should not make us abandon the GD forum altogether, that makes no sense.

    Thanks for holding INDIVIDUALS accountable for their actions instead of punishing the group. It is needed more and more in this world- across the board!

    I hate seeing GD threads go sour due to grown men acting like little boys measuring dicks and slinging feces.

    We are all here to learn and share, no reason to put eachtother down or make anyone feel inferior due to their specific opinion, religous belief, politics or otherwise.

    We need more true debate and less arguing. It all starts with thinking before posting. The preview button is your best friend second only to the search button...

    People need to grow thicker skin or just bow out. No one is forcing GD on anyone else...

    Thanks and take care A/C; it's good to see you posting so regularly again sir, for a plethora of reasons!


    Let the ball crushings commense!
    Last edited by THCDDM4; 05-24-13 at 12:17.
    We interrupt this programme to bring you an important news bulletin: the suspect in the Happy Times All-Girl Glee Club slaying has fled the scene and has managed to elude the police. He is armed and dangerous, and has been spotted in the West Side area, armed with a meat cleaver in one hand and his genitals in the other...

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by munch520 View Post
    And I apologize that my thread was no doubt a contributing factor to your posting this topic
    I can honestly say that this somewhat errant missive was written with no particular thread or member in mind, and in fact, I'm only rarely even aware of who is/is not engaged in one of these battles until a call for intervention comes in. At that point, it almost doesn't matter who has contributed most significantly to the problem, as my only real objective is to calm the waters and hit the "reset" button. This very thread is really nothing more than one big deliberate forced reboot.

    The truth is that even the biggest jerk on the site (whoever that might be -- we can always vote later ) is probably a decent-enough dude if you were sitting at a table with him one-on-one. We just tend to deal with each other differently in this medium, and as we've discussed before, folks don't get or give the same benefit of the doubt here that they would in-person. Recognizing this, you would think that guys would learn how to recognize and avoid these conflicts. With apologies to Gershwin, it ain't necessarily so.

    However we got here, and whoever has been involved, I'm no more interested in forced vacations, bans or ball-crushing than anyone else here. On the other hand, this sort of thing has to be stopped because (if you'll pardon me for being the one to make the observation) it is like a cancer in our community.

    At the end of the day, no one really cares if you were right or wrong, if you agreed or if you disagreed, or whether you won or lost ... but they will definitely remember if you treated them badly, or got in their face about something. Most of you will understand this (word to the wise, and all that ...) and do your part to fix it. Others will instead end up walking funny for a while. Some will likely disappear altogether. This isn't exactly Burger King, but this is definitely one instance where you truly can "have it your way."

    AC
    Stand your ground; don't fire unless fired upon, but if they mean to have a war, let it begin here. -- Captain John Parker, Lexington, 1775.

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    Chuck with each passing day you continue to remind us why we hold you in such high regard.

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    AC is without a doubt my favorite mod/admin on this site.

    And that ain't no ass kissin' either.
    But what then is capital punishment but the most premeditated of murders, to which no criminal's deed, however calculated it may be, can be compared? - Albert Camus

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