Tired and wanting a change but don't know what it is...

[Miami_JBT]

Little background info.

Was a cop in South Florida since 2006 and thought getting out of Miami would be a good idea so I took a state job and moved to North Florida. It is alright but still not feeling satisfied.

I have a wonderful wife, own my house free and clear, own my truck free and clear, only have 10k in debt due to a motorcycle accident (burned through my sick time but insurance didn't cover much due to the bike not being covered and the person hitting me not having coverage. The lapse in coverage was my fault due to a brain fart.) Health wise no issues at all. Even after the accident I'm good to go. Working on paying off my debt asap.

Having some thoughts of moving back to Miami but I have a feeling that I still won't be satisfied. Kinda feeling a bit discouraged in law enforcement and maybe want to do something else but not sure what it is. I like being a cop and love doing it because I actually believe in service ,honor, etc... but still feel discouraged sometimes. I have thoughts of starting a business but don't know what business to start or what options I have for loans or grants. I am hispanic and hate the idea of looking for race related services but I figure I pay into taxes so why not get the services I pay for. Also think of law school and maybe being a lawyer but then I think about how hard it is to get into the market since it is flooded with recent graduates. Also the idea of opening a business in this market scares me to death with the way the economy is being propped up on lies and the way the government is screwing people over.

I have no college degree and don't know what to get my degree in or if I should look at a trade school instead. Law School interests me as I said early but not sure on that either.

I feel that on one side I am doing great and on another I feel like crap? Turning 30 next year and just feel that I don't know where to go from here. Not sure on a lot of things except to keep a roof over our heads, put food on the table, keep my wife safe, and know for sure that she is the best thing in my life. I feel right now that I should have the world by the balls but instead I feel very insecure and nervous of what's around the bend in terms of the economy, liberty, and career growth. I don't want to risk what we have but I feel that we are in a no growth environment and I don't know what will allow us to grow.

Am I going through something normal? Is this how it felt under Carter? Am I going through some odd early midlife crisis?

[021411]

Sounds like you need a LONG good vacation somewhere. Keep the job. I guarantee you you'll regret leaving. Ever consider moving to another dept in another state? Sometimes that can make the difference.
Being an LEO where I'm at is a super stable gig. Our benefits are great and pay is great. Built into our contract is a bank of days off (160 hrs) we get every year to burn. I could take a super long vacation right now if I wanted to. That's not including other paid time off and other time off banks.

[Caduceus]

Screen yourself for depression too. Google PHQ-9 and see how you fare.

[ryan]

Time to go fishing.

[kcara]

I agree with the suggestions to take a vacation. We all get burned out. Do not eject until you have a good job lined up.

I can concur that it is not much better in corporate America. Don't sweat the small stuff. The economy is still bad right now.

[Moose-Knuckle]

Don't "cut your nose off to spite your face."

I find myself in a similar predicament, while I'm grateful to be employed the agency I work for is run by people who are incompetent. It is a dysfunctional organization from top to bottom, no morale, high turnover rate, etc. Been there ten years now. I'm always looking at either going through the hiring process with another agency (though I'd rather commit ritual suicide) or just go into something else altogether. The wife and I do not have any kids yet but are looking at having a baby in a year or so; it get olds missing out on holidays, birthdays, and anniversaries all the while working for a bunch of ****ing idiots.

[ABNAK]

I'm in the healthcare field. Been doing it for > 23 years. Pretty much despised it for > 23 years too.

However........

It pays my bills (wife is in healthcare too, between us we're comfortable, maybe upper-middle class----DINK). We take our vacations, I buy my toys. House with 22 acres *should* be paid off in 8 more years. 3 vehicles, one paid off. Both of us are VA employees so with my Army time I'm shooting for retiring at 62. Other than my job I like my life.

I just turned 48. I've gotta deal with this shit another 14 or so years. At this point a total career change is out of the question. Maybe a different job within the VA healthcare system that's less aggravating, but other than that I guess I'm here for the duration.

What is the point of this rambling? Well, very few people get to do for a living something that they ENJOY, or something that's a hobby too. Like if I opened a gunshop or such. The vast majority of us schleps have to suck it up and make a living that will most likely involve something we'd rather not be doing if it wasn't for the paycheck. That's why they call it "work"! For instance, I refuse to watch medical shows or read medical journals or articles. No interest whatsoever outside of my scheduled shifts.

Take heart. I've been in your position of apparent "despair-lite", then realized that other than my job my life was pretty decent----and that very job did indeed help make it that way financially. At 30 you are young enough to make a switch but consider if the cumulative experience you have is worth throwing away.



(caveat: I'm experienced and hold 2 credentials. I do my job thoroughly, professionally, and with a bit of OC, which isn't a bad thing in the medical field....I just don't like it and can't stand following lazy people, but you'll find them in any line of work I guess)

[Miami_JBT]

The wife and I have been discussing this for a while and I think a career change might be in order since I'm young enough to do it. I have always thought about teaching high school level civics and government. Figure try to be a mentor to kids. I loved being a school resource officer and I have always had the idea of being a teacher in the back of my head. Besides; I'd still be serving my community and help craft the next generation to not he Obama zombies.

She said go to college, get a degree in political science, and take the Florida exam. At no point while we were discussing this did I have bad feelings. It was the opposite. I felt positive and excited. I like politics; a degree period will open more doors for me as a cop even if I don't become a teacher (but once I set myself to a goal I achieve it or die... so if I am serious about this I will try out teaching).

Figure finish my degree, move back to Miami for her sake (she hates it up here), become a teacher, and stay as a reserve. My cousin, aunt, and one of my very good friends are teachers. Picked their brain a little. Hears some positives, some negative, and just common sense stuff. Scheduling would be a he of a lot better. Holidays, weekend, and summers off. Stay in the FRS retirement system and my time carries over as a full time cop. Since it is better scheduling I can be with my wife more.

Since I got married; a lot of my priorities have changed. Things that I would have loved to do career wise when I was single now don't interest me. Just see being with her more.important and I do want to be a father.

Lastly figure if I become a teacher and stay as a reserve I can still carry in school and actually be able to prevent something or at least stop the threat before it grows. Any of the agencies in Miami that I'd be a reserve allow their officers to carry off duty whether full time or not.

[Miami_JBT]

Don't "cut your nose off to spite your face."

I find myself in a similar predicament, while I'm grateful to be employed the agency I work for is run by people who are incompetent. It is a dysfunctional organization from top to bottom, no morale, high turnover rate, etc. Been there ten years now. I'm always looking at either going through the hiring process with another agency (though I'd rather commit ritual suicide) or just go into something else altogether. The wife and I do not have any kids yet but are looking at having a baby in a year or so; it get olds missing out on holidays, birthdays, and anniversaries all the while working for a bunch of ****ing idiots.

Yeah, I know the feeling... hence me looking at different options. Been throwing a lot of ideas too the wall to see what sticks. So far me looking at teaching works.

The agency I currently work for is a shadow of its former self and was pretty underhanded to recruit me when I was looking to get out of Miami. Sadly I didn't know anyone in it so they got me hook, line, and sinker. The place is rotten from top to bottom and there is no comradery what so ever. Another reason for a change of pace. So far the two agencies that I worked for are all levels of cluter f##ks.

[Dienekes]

Oh, yeah. About 30 years ago my stress meter was beyond maxed out between getting married, building a house, and having our first kid, all within a year. I was an SA with a totally dysfunctional federal agency (now in the news and things are even worse now) and working for a certifiably crazy supervisor. NOT a good time in my life.

God obviously has a sense of humor, as the criminal equivalent of the Star Wars Death Star showed up and all the foregoing problems got put into perspective, fast. Short version is that if I wrote a book no one would ever believe it; but a small bunch of us bucked our own agency, worked way outside the box, and against all odds the good guys--with help from some good people, more or less won. Looking back I had spent all of my life getting ready for this case. But my partner and I survived it, did some good stuff, and learned a hell of a lot in the process. Wouldn't want to do it again, but it sure cured my burn-out.

Life is funny. Stuff turns out better than you thought it would but some days the dragon wins. Some days he really kicks your ass.

My son is a commercial pilot and his road is a hard one, just in different ways.

We're not called upon to always be successful, but we are called upon to do things with courage and integrity. Sounds to me like you're going to be just fine.

Good luck and a fair wind.