Goddam F$#*#&*_$! Pills In F*%@#$*@! Blisterpacks...

[SteyrAUG]

Same effin crap almost every night.



I attempt to remove ONE pill. I succeed in either exposing three or more pills or opening just one pill which launches with the force of a AR-15 detent spring the one time you try and work on a bench outside. The pill lands somewhere on my white tile floor where it is now invisible, except of course to my dogs who think everything on the floor is a tasty treat meant for them.

With 10X reading glasses and my trusty SureFire 6PX Tactical flashlight I eventually find the pill (which is white and slightly smaller than a tic tac) before my dogs do and it has typically come to a stop at the baseboards under my counter and is settled in a fine bed of dog hair. I remind myself I need to vacuum the damn floorboards but my wife has already gone to bed.

Observing the 3 minute rule (similar to 3 second rule but applied to expensive prescriptions) I wipe the pill back and forth across the front of my shirt until I mentally accept it as sanitary enough to put in my mouth. Then as my dosage is to take "half a pill nightly" I attempt to cleanly snap the pill into two even parts which usually involves me relaunching the pill against the kitchen cabinets (where I get to repeat the above exercise a few more times) or successfully breaking the pill into two "almost equal" parts with one of them skidding across the counter into a variety of "crap I need to do" piles which typically conceal the pill for up to 5 minutes.

I drop the unneeded half of the pill into an old prescription bottle from years back for the same Rx before they started coming in blister packs. I wonder to myself, as I have done every night for the last couple years, why they simply can't come in a typical prescription bottle like the rest of my damn pills which would spare me from having to engage in this scenario every other night.

The pill is to help me with stress / anxiety so I don't have trouble getting sleep.

Along those lines Band Aids should be on a scotch tape type dispenser. You typically need to be able to get a Band Aid with one damn hand and that peel apart to open crap really isn't helping anyone.

And only the sickest of bastards would put Migraine medication in packaging where you have to peel off the paper layer to then pop the pill out of a blister pack.

I don't think the people who package this stuff know who they are messing with.

[Waylander]

Pseudoephedrine works better for me so I do the mandatory long form when my sinuses are really acting up. I like how the pill packs only have a foil backing but the new pseudo alternative pills have the foil and paper

I love how the paper is glued to the foil like the stickers that never even come close to peeling off. So I've carefully attempted to peel all four corners of the paper which have torn off into four little square millimeter shreds so I do what I should've done all along and cut the damn thing open with a knife. Then on to pill number two.

Meanwhile a meth head with the shakes has processed a 20x20 sleeve of pseudo.

[Kain]

Steyr could you by chance set up a video camera tomorrow night and video tape this? Some of us could us a good laugh, and I am sure if you set up a youtube account with one of those ad thingy that you get a penny or two per view you could afford another MP5 before the year is out.
Thank you!

[Caduceus]

Knife tip and just cut a small circle along the perimeter.

[Averageman]

Knife tip and just cut a small circle along the perimeter.

I discovered this and it helped me keep what's left of my sanity.

[TAZ]

Go to the nearest Walgreens/CVS and buy yourself a pill divider. They are cheap and will save you the pill launching debacle. I think you can also request non blister packs from the pharmacy when they fill the rx.

[Abraham]

After peeling - push on the back of the pill and it should break through without being launched.

That's how I do it when I have to take a migraine pill that also come in those miserable blister packages.

[BIGUGLY]

Wow I though I was the only one that had this problem. I gave up and go for a tool every time. Trusty Benchmade knife or the Henkle scissors, those damn things are so hard to peel open without launching the thing into the next time zone.

[tb-av]

I think they figured that someone like yourself with 40,000 edged weapons would probably enjoy cutting your way in rather than the punch and hope method.

[SteyrAUG]

Knife tip and just cut a small circle along the perimeter.

While I genuinely appreciate your advice and the spirit of assistance with which it was offered, I shouldn't need to deploy knives, cutters or anything else to access a pill. I used to just take the cap off.

When I can contemplate the matter without become frustrated to the point of being livid, I'll probably adopt one or more of the suggestions that have been offered. Right now the most "reasonable solution" in my mind is to thrust a katana in my belt and raid Wal Mart pharmacy as if it were Kira's mansion until they learn the error of their ways.

But hopefully with the coke and slice I'll have for lunch, such thoughts will pass as they have before.