3. If I adopt when do you start sitting down the dates when your "cleaning" your firearms Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
Not the way to go since if it my son that comes by to pick her up, he'll just end up talking guns with you all night. Guns aren't the right way to go. Open the door to the garage and show him a shovel and and a bag of lime and tell him that he won't be missed.

God bless you. Sounds like an absolute crap storm with this little girl in the center. Don't forget to take care of yourself.

Two year olds are like smart hunting dogs. They will get away with as much shennanigans as you let them. Consistency in rules/discipline and lots of attention for positive behavior is about as simple as the complex problem can be put. Every kid is different and responds differently. She doesn't know that her life has been totally jacked, that is all she knows. Getting her into healthy routines as fast as you can, is all I can think of.

Good luck.

Child proof the house. It is a hoot. Like little chinese puzzles all over the place.