Back story,

My stepmom passed this summer. Old school couple she paid all the bills etc.
My 84 year old Father is clueless on bills.
He's basically Archie Bunker & Don Rickles or so he thinks. He's basically freaking rude and mean to everyone. He's an Ass

Tried to get him to go to the bank and make sure everything was set up on auto pay. After the funeral so he had no worries.
He wouldn't hear of it.
Found her life insurance helped him fill it out. Would have paid all his bills and left him with some extra.
He call me several months later saying he doesn't know where his money is going. Me 'what happen to the life insurance" Him" None of your freak business!' Me thinking why are you calling me?
Debt collectors have come knocking.
Found out he's paying $200 a month to store Christmas decorations he hasn't put up in years.
He's got a expensive RV he can't drive & still owes on, & paying storage. He won't sell it because he'll lose money on it.. It's slowly dryrotting

He's partially wheel chair, handicapped. He's retired Air Force 20 plus years & same in the Navy as a Civilian highest GS? you can retire as so he's got a good pension and the VA. Pays for everything i think.

He wasn't answering his phone thanksgiving, & no one heard from him. I was about to Call the Stockton PD to do a welfare check ( I live in Jackson wyoming). When his VA supplied Care giver called( Not a live in ). He's pissing in bed sleeping in it, not wearing his depends and crapping around the house.. when walking(handicapped rails all around house) around naked and watching porn.
The VA supplied Care Giver Business & the VA rep. try to check but He refused to let them in. He refused to let a Replacement Care giver in.

He's convinced himself he's marrying his current one, she's ready to quit as he's telling everyone same thing.

Me and my little sister are at a loss on what to do.(Older sister could care less, refer old thread "stupid family drama")

He refuses to relinquish any type of Control wether it be financial, or whatever. But can't pay his bills the remainder of his brothers don't talk to him.

I told the current care giver that if she quit I would't hold it against her.
She Stated he should be in a Some Form of Facility, I doubt if he'd go to one( as he stated he's going to die in his house)


I'm open for advice, who to contact? The VA? would they actually talk to me? Some Dept with the State of Ca.?