Advice Wanted: Closet Conservative

[Business_Casual]

Im against abortion, for example. Im pro-gun for example. HOW could I associate with people who believe in murdering babies? Who believe in partial birth, who think its ok to sell baby body parts?
HOW could I associate with people who want to dis-arm me? Who think IM evil for owning weapons for fun, sport & SD? HOW can you "avoid" these conversations with people who are your "friends"?
Know what? My FRIENDS and I have NO subject we have to avoid to remain friends.
Ive HEARD the others sides arguments for five decades now. Dont need to keep hearing or "learn" anything else from them.
Go and go up into that shithole place & stay from now on. Glad its you & not me.

And here we have an example of how polarized and weaponized opinions have been made. It’s a mirror image.

[Mozart]

Im against abortion, for example. Im pro-gun for example. HOW could I associate with people who believe in murdering babies? Who believe in partial birth, who think its ok to sell baby body parts?
HOW could I associate with people who want to dis-arm me? Who think IM evil for owning weapons for fun, sport & SD? HOW can you "avoid" these conversations with people who are your "friends"?
Know what? My FRIENDS and I have NO subject we have to avoid to remain friends.
Ive HEARD the others sides arguments for five decades now. Dont need to keep hearing or "learn" anything else from them.
Go and go up into that shithole place & stay from now on. Glad its you & not me.

You will probably find that most people don’t believe in murdering babies. That is, for the most part, a straw man argument created by the pro-life side. What they really believe is that a human should have control over their body. In that regard, they aren’t that dissimilar from the anti-forced-vaccination crowd, or the drug legalization crowd: “I will choose what happens to my body.“ I mean, that to me even sounds just like the 2A self-defense crowd. I will choose what happens to my body. There is common ground there if you boil the stances down to their very core mission statement.

Anyway, getting off track. Thank you for providing input. I really think, for me, a mixture of finding new friends that share like-minds, and keep lifelong friends that understand we should keep it lighthearted and avoid worldview conversations, is my best way forward. The trouble may be in finding like-minded people up there.

[Averageman]

I highly recommend drinking heavily and working hard, it doesn't work for everyone, but it has been good to me.

[MegademiC]

You will probably find that most people don’t believe in murdering babies. That is, for the most part, a straw man argument created by the pro-life side. What they really believe is that a human should have control over their body. In that regard, they aren’t that dissimilar from the anti-forced-vaccination crowd, or the drug legalization crowd: “I will choose what happens to my body.“ I mean, that to me even sounds just like the 2A self-defense crowd. I will choose what happens to my body. There is common ground there if you boil the stances down to their very core mission statement.

Anyway, getting off track. Thank you for providing input. I really think, for me, a mixture of finding new friends that share like-minds, and keep lifelong friends that understand we should keep it lighthearted and avoid worldview conversations, is my best way forward. The trouble may be in finding like-minded people up there.

So instead of driving the conversation into baby killer vs rights-taker... maybe try to come to common acceptance areas that you both find tolorable... maybe when to define life, or stop charging drunks for 2 deaths when they kill a pregnant woman.




(The last part is tounge-in cheek, an example I use to push people in a more pro life direction from their talking points).

[Aries144]

Mozart,

You are confronting the behavior of a different tribe than the one you wish to belong to. Unless you have influence over the powers that made them think the way they do (media, education, and government), you won't change their minds without extricating them from their tribe and surrounding them with yours, one at a time. And it takes years.

They will never accept you for who and what you are. They will always feel uncomfortable around you until you are more like them. That's just how we humans work. No way around it.

[Adrenaline_6]

I treat the left thinking, whether it be family or friends the same way I treat and tell newly married guys to treat their wives.

I give an analogy that you are the fish and they are the fishers. They caught you and have set the drag. How tight that drag is individual and different for different "fishermen" but do not think it is not set.

If they do not approve of you doing something or being/acting a certain way and you are willing to give that something up, then say nothing, accept it, and don't bitch about it when the day comes that you are expected not to do that/act that way any longer.

If you are not willing to give up that something or give up acting/being a certain way. You fight for every inch...all the time...because every inch you give up will most certainly be reeled in and getting it back will be a lot harder than if you had fought for it from the get go. Every hill is worth dying on if that hill means something to you. Your choice.

The far left functions the same way.

[BoringGuy45]

I'm in the midst of earning my Master's in Social Work. Now, believe it or not, my professors and classmates are a LOT less volatile than one may think, and they've actually been very welcoming of me, even knowing my background in police/corrections. Most of them honestly want to learn from me what law enforcement is really like, and all have been accepting of my honest answers (I tell them the good and the bad). That being said, they are mostly hyper leftist. I'm on good terms with them by remaining silent in areas where I know we will never agree. Most don't know that I hold mostly conservative views; there's no point in arguing, so I'll save myself the grief. I find common ground with them on the areas where I am more moderate to liberal (such as my hatred for big pharma and health insurance companies). I just need my degree so I can apply for the jobs I want.

[telecustom]

I treat the left thinking, whether it be family or friends the same way I treat and tell newly married guys to treat their wives.

I give an analogy that you are the fish and they are the fishers. They caught you and have set the drag. How tight that drag is individual and different for different "fishermen" but do not think it is not set.

If they do not approve of you doing something or being/acting a certain way and you are willing to give that something up, then say nothing, accept it, and don't bitch about it when the day comes that you are expected not to do that/act that way any longer.

If you are not willing to give up that something or give up acting/being a certain way. You fight for every inch...all the time...because every inch you give up will most certainly be reeled in and getting it back will be a lot harder than if you had fought for it from the get go. Every hill is worth dying on if that hill means something to you. Your choice.

The far left functions the same way.

That was perfect advice!

[Straight Shooter]

I'm in the midst of earning my Master's in Social Work. Now, believe it or not, my professors and classmates are a LOT less volatile than one may think, and they've actually been very welcoming of me, even knowing my background in police/corrections. Most of them honestly want to learn from me what law enforcement is really like, and all have been accepting of my honest answers (I tell them the good and the bad). That being said, they are mostly hyper leftist. I'm on good terms with them by remaining silent in areas where I know we will never agree. Most don't know that I hold mostly conservative views; there's no point in arguing, so I'll save myself the grief. I find common ground with them on the areas where I am more moderate to liberal (such as my hatred for big pharma and health insurance companies). I just need my degree so I can apply for the jobs I want.

So, outside of doing what you must to earn your degree, which I agree, would you bring them into your personal inner circle, as friends & confidantes, if you STILL had to "remain silent" & not "argue"? I cannot see that as being friends. NO ONE that knows me would be shocked that I carried or used a gun in self defense, they'd be shocked if I didnt,actually.

I used two examples of my beliefs to make a point-not to turn this into a thread about abortion,which Ill never condone, but you saying its a "straw man argument" and "most people dont believe in murdering babies"...YES, THEY DO. About half of the country, or more do.
So, right there, I wouldnt/couldnt bring someone in as a close friend, certainly someone I thought I needed to move back to the wasteland called New York.
Adrenaline 6 is 100% correct- they day you need help, or try to defend yourself, and they are shocked/angered/pissed over the fact that you own a gun and plan to use it, and they narc you out for it, dont act all surprised. This is EXACTLY whats happened with Red Flag laws, so dont poo poo it out of hand.
I guess my definition of friend is much different than yours or others here. Almost ALL of my circle have been in my life well over 40 years. Some over 45. We've been thru deaths, births, divorces, marriages, ups, downs, lefts & rights. There is NOTHING I dont know about them or their feelings about any subject, and they feel the same about me. Would I move somewhere to get back to these people? In a heartbeat.
And without ANY doubt, I know how they will be come hell or high water- and they know what Ill do too. An we dont have to avoid anything, and no one has to remain silent about jack shit.

[Straight Shooter]

And here we have an example of how polarized and weaponized opinions have been made. It’s a mirror image.

So,just asking as I exit to go to work...you have people you call friends who believe different than your core beliefs?
And, Im not understanding the weaponized aspect of your comment, if could explain that Id appreciate it.