Hitman (Review)

[WillBrink]

I never understood why this movie was not more popular. I saw it when it came out and watched it last night, and it's as good or better than say John Wick. Highly stylized action scenes, a decent plot, good acting, great actors like Timothy Olyphant, great sets, etc. I didn't even know it was based on a vid game and it's rated R due to showing perky boobies. And lawd do I love Olga Konstiantinivna Kurylenko in that movie... B+

[extremist]

Great movie and yes, Olga is so cute.

[WillBrink]

Great movie and yes, Olga is so cute.

Most of the actresses dudes get all worked up over don't really do it for me. She does it for me...

[Diamondback]

Movies had nothing on the games, though... I actually had a Psych prof *assign* me to play Hitman 2 back in college back when I was having a little trouble squaring my conscience with the idea that protecting the young lady who'd entrusted herself to my overwatch could mean having to end the stalker ex who was threatening her. (Spoiler: H2 had 47 retire to a monastery, only to see the priest who'd been mentoring him along a better path abducted by an old enemy. "Time to dig up the past...")

[Artos]

It's one of those flicks I'll tune into whenever it surfaces...you are right & don't hear much on it.

[WillBrink]

Movies had nothing on the games, though... I actually had a Psych prof *assign* me to play Hitman 2 back in college back when I was having a little trouble squaring my conscience with the idea that protecting the young lady who'd entrusted herself to my overwatch could mean having to end the stalker ex who was threatening her. (Spoiler: H2 had 47 retire to a monastery, only to see the priest who'd been mentoring him along a better path abducted by an old enemy. "Time to dig up the past...")

Well, I can't say as I didn't even know it was based on a game at the time, just as I see movies or shows these days only to hear they are based on a comic. What was obvious about this movie was the director didn't just phone in a crappy movie to support a game franchise like say Doom and made an excellent stand alone movie in it's own right. It did the John Wik thing before there was a John Wick movie, and in some respects did it better. And of course the games do not have the perky ta ta's of Olga

[Jellybean]

Most of the actresses dudes get all worked up over don't really do it for me. She does it for me...

Bro... watch Oblivion. She's not in it til about a third through, but even more adorable. No bewbs though, sorry.

I never understood why this movie was not more popular.

Because, like pretty much every movie made that is based on a video game, it sucked @$$. You would not understand unless you'd played the games. There is literally NOTHING in the movie that hits the vibe of the games, or the character of Agent 47 IN the games.
Yeah, they picked a bald guy that vaguely physically resembles 47, made him a hitman and stuck the name on the title. That's it. That's all they have in common.
The Hitman games aren't 'John Wick 1.0", there's so much more I dare say, subtlety, to the games than the bland action fest the movie was I would spend a few pages trying to explain it.
If you know you know. For God's sake, they didn't even have him swap clothes with a guy for a disguise ONCE, and that's a HUGE part of the games... just whiffed right over their heads because apparently the producers either never played the games, or didn't give a shit when they did.
*Maybe* if you've never played the games, you can view it simply from the lens of an action movie, but if you've played the game franchise it is simply mediocre and mildly infuriating.
NOTHING in that movie would get you an 'expert' rating, just the 'terrorist' rating in the games.

Ironically, I actually thought the second movie in the franchise did a slightly better job with the character.... *slightly*...

If you want to know what the movies SHOULD have been like, watch the opening scene of The Mechanic with Jason Statham (2011). Banged it right on the head.
Honestly that whole movie had a better 'hitman' vibe with the assassinations they do than the namesake movies.

[FromMyColdDeadHand]

It's not as good a John Wick 1, but way better than John Wick the Turd.

Olga Konstiantinivna Kurylenko - OK with an extra K. Sweet mother of eurotrash babes....

It's funny that it doesn't sync with the game, I thought bringing in 'game' attributes kind of detracted from it, and it seemed it didn't add much for game lovers.

[WillBrink]

Because, like pretty much every movie made that is based on a video game, it sucked @$$. You would not understand unless you'd played the games. There is literally NOTHING in the movie that hits the vibe of the games, or the character of Agent 47 IN the games.

I'm rating as a stand alone movie, and as such, I enjoyed it a lot, thought was well done, and liked it more than Wick personally. I went to see 300 not knowing it was based on a comic and thought it sucked. Those who were fans of the comic liked it apparently for keeping the vibe of the comic. I thought the 12 foot transvestite and monsters and such were just goofy.

My ratings are always based on the movie as a stand alone entity.

[Jellybean]

Yeah Will, I'm just giving you the rant as to why the movie wasn't more popular, like you wondered.
There is a huge video game market for movies out there, but they never hit right because the studios are looking for a cash grab not a legit movie based on the game. If you look up pretty much any movie based on a game, they all generally suck. It's kind of an ongoing sore spot in the gaming community.
In case you were wondering.
On the flip side, comic book to movies generally seem to go better. See: the entire MCU movieverse, batman, joker, etc etc.

The thing with 300, is that you have to look at it as a mythologization of events, told in spectacular fireside fashion to the viewers by Eyepatch Spartan. Then it makes sense.
But I agree, it's kind of one of those movies where, if you watch it once every couple years it's epic and awesome, but gets cheesy REAL fast the more you watch it.
Also the second one was pretty terrible, and there's a reason nobody talks about it (despite Eva Green's bewbs lol).