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Thread: You can't make this stuff up.

  1. #1
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    You can't make this stuff up.

    You can't make this kinda shit up... Truth is stranger than fiction. http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive...19102vib1.html
    APRIL 19--A California Highway Patrol office was briefly evacuated earlier this month when investigators became concerned that an arrestee might have been carrying a concealed explosive device. When officers collared Steven Ferrini on a drug charge, a search of the 60-year-old suspect turned up "a suspicious wire, with an on/off switch" in his pants pocket. "The wire was found to extend from the pant pocket to the subject's anus," according to a CHP report, a copy of which you'll find here. Though Ferrini claimed that the wire was connected to an anal vibrator, officers became suspicious when he subsequently "began to explain his knowledge of explosives and bomb making." So they called in El Dorado County's "explosive ordinance disposal" team and, at 5:45 AM, evacuated "all unnecessary personnel" from the CHP's South Lake Tahoe office. At about 9 AM, the bomb squad "rendered the device safe" and determined it was not dangerous. The report does not indicate why more than three hours passed before the vibrator was found not to be an explosive device. "The vibrator was subsequently removed and placed into property," according to report, which does not identify the CHP employee tasked with that unfortunate evidence collection responsibility. Ferrini is pictured below in an El Dorado County Sheriff's Office mug shot snapped following his April 7 arrest.
    Police report here: http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive...19102vib2.html

  2. #2
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    eewwwww...irish, that's nasty!!
    "You cannot invade the mainland United States. There would be a rifle behind each blade of grass."
    Japanese Admiral Yamamoto, 1941




    "A wise man's heart directs him toward the right, but a foolish man's heart directs him toward the left."
    Ecclesiastes 10:2:

  3. #3
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    Classic!

  4. #4
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    It sounds like the officers were acting with an abundance of caution.

    ...or, perhaps, had a score to settle with the bomb squad.

    Why a three hour delay? Well....think about it. Who's gonna be the first to volunteer to go get that thing? Probably turned into a full-on rock/paper/scissors tournament to find the "lucky" guy who had to remove the marital aid from the guy's rectum.

  5. #5
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    ^ Having to remove it would be bad enough, but can you imagine if the legacy you left for your family was that you are the guy who got blown up by the ass-bomb? The shame.

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by John_Wayne777 View Post
    It sounds like the officers were acting with an abundance of caution.

    ...or, perhaps, had a score to settle with the bomb squad.

    Why a three hour delay? Well....think about it. Who's gonna be the first to volunteer to go get that thing? Probably turned into a full-on rock/paper/scissors tournament to find the "lucky" guy who had to remove the marital aid from the guy's rectum.
    Marital aide??? Only in California.
    Time flies when you throw your watch.

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by Artos View Post
    eewwwww...irish, that's nasty!!
    I don't write it, I just post it I feel bad for the coppers who had to deal with this shit.

  8. #8
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    Ahhahaaahahahhhaaaahahahahahaha =D

  9. #9
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    The report ... does not identify the CHP employee tasked with that unfortunate evidence collection responsibility.
    Man, that guy is goning to be the butt of jokes for a while. I bet everyone in going to be a real ass to him.
    GLOCK PREFECTION

  10. #10
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    Booked into evidence.....

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dqpMSbS3I38

    Note the smirk on the Officer's face. It's hard to see under his porn 'stache.

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